


Gorilla

by Quibbles



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Angst, Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flirting, Happy Ending, Infidelity, Link has Wings, M/M, One-Sided Love, Oral Sex, Pining, Recreational Drug Use, Semi-Public Sex, Sexuality, Slow Burn, Smut, The Year is 2015, Vacation, oblivious!Link, pining!Rhett
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-04-13 23:31:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 26,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14123208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quibbles/pseuds/Quibbles
Summary: Slowly, and all at once, Rhett can't get Link off his mind. It's bizarre, and it's kind of ruining his life. But Rhett isn't one to just let things sit. Especially not after the cabin.





	1. Thoughts

“So whaddaya think? And don’t hold back, I don’t wanna go messin’ up a good thing for no reason.” Link’s brow was furrowed as he gazed at himself in the reflection of the rear-view mirror, his fingers combing through the bangs that lay against his forehead.

Rhett glanced at Link, before returning his attention to the road. He had his hair pushed back from his forehead and had done his best at flattening the wings that sat on either side of his temples. “Kinda like mine you mean?” He asked, mostly for clarification, partly to get a rise out of Link.

“Yeah, I’ll consult you when I want to look like a fancy ice-cream cone.” Link retorted, quirking a smile “Anyways, thoughts?”

“It’s kinda hard to imagine. Been a while since you changed your hair.”

“I’m mostly worried about my big forehead.”

“Your foreheads fine man. Your hair looks good like that. Shows more of your face.” Rhett pulled into the GMM lot, sliding into the parking lot closest to the entrance. “Your wings are pretty iconic though. We’d have to change our logo. Not sure if I’m willing to make that sacrifice.”

“The sacrifice of _what_ exactly?” Link chuckled, fussing at his hair with his fingertips distractedly, and Rhett flashed a smile back, glancing at Link. He could kind of see the hair thing Link was going for. Sweeping his hair away from his face would do well for his face shape, and his bright blue eyes pop even more than they already did. Rhett opened his mouth to say something to that effect but paused a beat. It was a strange thought to speak out-loud, but the trippy part was it wasn’t the strangest thought he’d had in the last few weeks.

Rhett didn’t know what to make of it.

If you asked Rhett Mclaughlin how he felt about his sexuality, the answer would definitely be ‘comfortable.’ You didn’t run a company with your best friend that everyone and their mother thought was your lover, without at least being _okay_ with your sexuality. Rhett could safely say Link was objectively attractive, he read the YouTube comments, and understood the basic tenants of attractiveness. This wasn’t a difficult observation to make. Despite Link’s lopsided smile and his permanently downturned mouth and furrowed brow, yes, he was objectively attractive.

But lately, in sudden, random moments like this one, with the sunlight streaming in through the windshield, bouncing off Link’s tanned skin, reflecting in his eyes that swum brilliant blue, and he was messing around in his hair with that downturned mouth...it was …pleasant to observe, like in the kind of way where Rhett didn’t want to look away and it made his chest a little tight.

 “Sun’s in my eye.” Link complained, adjusting his glasses. “Why’s there always gotta be so much sun in the morning?”

Rhett blinked hard and readjusted his focus to the road ahead. “Only you could complain about the sun, man. You know how many people would kill to have this weather in March?”

“Well, what’s stoppin’ them? They should get to killin’ so they can come out here and experience this blinding sunlight smoking their retinas, and then complain about It, just like me.” Link retorted, yanking his glasses off and rubbing at his eyes.

Rhett chuckled, and shook off the strangeness of the moment just passed. He probably was just stressed out, or hungry, or both. Probably both. “Easy, grumpy. We’ll get you your coffee in a second.”

 

 

  
“Where is everyone?” Rhett glanced around the break room as he walked in, noting the absence of human lifeforms, aside from Link, who stood leaned against the counter with his coffee, mulling over a small notepad.

“Lunch special at Kenzo’s.” Link mumbled, suddenly scribbling at his notepad.

“Why didn’t you go?” Rhett asked, shuffling towards the fridge to mull over its contents. “Lunch special not special enough for you?”

“I _hate_ Kenzo’s.” Link paused his intense scribbling for a second to shoot Rhett a glance. “You knew that.”

“I thought it was Morty’s.” Rhett decided on a tempting chilled meatball sub and made quick work of unwrapping and digging into it.

“Nope. Kenzo’s. Everybody loves it, but I think they just like the _idea_ of it, y’know? It’s like quinoa.” Link shook his head in disdain. There was a beat of silence, during which Rhett chewed his sub and regretted not heating it up in the microwave. He debated whether this was information worth sharing, but Link spoke before he’d decided. “Were you happy with the writers meeting today?”

Rhett quirked his brow, glancing at Link as a cue for him to elaborate.

“I feel like…I didn’t…there wasn’t anything to get me excited, y’know? There were some okay ideas, but that was it, they were just…okay.” Link squinted at his notepad. “Not that what I’m coming up with is any better. I feel like the energy’s getting all sucked up outta me here.”

“What’re you thinking, then?” Rhett asked, recognizing quickly that Link needed to be steered towards some sort of verbal conclusion before he frustrated himself overthinking things.

“I’m thinkin’…it might be cabin time.” Link adjusted his glasses and frowned down at his notepad, before tossing it on the counter. “I’m just…there’s like over a dozen episodes I’m not excited about, I’m not lookin’ forward to and I feel like it’s not too late to change the trajectory.”

“Really? You wanna do cabin time mid-season? What aren’t you happy with?” Rhett studied Link’s expression, noting the frustration painted across his face. He’d long learned how to maneuver Link’s many moods, when to push, when to ease back, and when to plain just shut up. Sometimes the shift was so quick it was nearly indiscernible, but right now, he could clearly see Link’s face closing off as he frustrated himself trying to get the right words out.

“Just, well, for one, we have too many _‘Will It’s’_. I think we need some more original ideas. And too many taste tests, too many episodes about food in general.” Link frowned, slipping off his wedding ring before beginning to fiddle with it between his thumb and forefinger. “I get that they’re popular, I just—”

“Let’s do it. Jessie wants to take the kids to visit her sister for Spring Break anyways, she won’t mind me joining a little late. Plus, it’s for work. We can make it a tax write-off.” Rhett offered his best reassuring smile, hoping to pull Link from his thoughts before he sank too deep into worrying over them.

“Yeah?” Link downed his coffee, not entirely convinced. His fingers paused in their fiddling, wedding band pressed against his thumb.

“Yeah. We can drive up next weekend. Nothin’ to it. Now, stop fussing.” Rhett was relieved to watch Link’s expression clear. There had always been a lot he was willing to do to keep his best friend happy, but lately, seeing Link upset had become more unsettling than he remembered it ever being before, and urge to keep him smiling that lopsided smile was nearly overwhelming.  So, when Link grinned at him, his eyes flashing in excitement, Rhett felt his stomach flip, just a little. It felt so good.

And Rhett just didn’t know what to make of it.


	2. The Cabin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys head off to the cabin.

“You ready there, buddyroll? Ready to hit the open road? Breathe in that crisp, summer air?” Rhett clapped a hand on Link’s shoulder, flashing a grin that was met with a quick glare.

“I’ll be ready once my coffee’s kicked in.” Link tossed his duffle into the trunk before shuffling towards the passenger seat and sliding into the car. “Why’re we leaving at butt-o-clock in the morning anyway?”

“Gotta beat the morning traffic.” Rhett refused to be dissuaded by Link’s less than enthusiastic mood.  “Probably wasn’t a great idea to pick Spring Break as the weekend to travel, but it’s all good. I got it all planned. Cabin’s booked—”

“Two rooms, right? I’m not up for a repeat of last time.” Link interjected, clicking his seatbelt into place.

“Yup. Trust me, neither am I. Cabin’s booked, we’ll grab beer on the way, and I hear the lakes particularly inviting right about now.”

“Awesome. Let’s get s’mores, too.” Link perked a little at the idea of beer. There wasn’t much time for casual drinking when you were a family man with a trio of kids. Sitting around a campfire with Rhett and a couple of beers was a simple pleasure he forgot he missed till it was happening again.

“Let’s get s’mores too.” Rhett’s tone was mocking. “Let’s get—of course we’re getting s’mores! Do I look like an animal to you??”

“Depends on the angle.” Link mumbled, plugging the directions into the GPS system. “Sometimes you look a little Grizzly.”

“Even a Grizzly would know to bring s’mores.” Rhett smirked, pulling out of the darkened driveway. The sun was only just beginning to peek over the horizon. Everything was a quiet, hazy blue, just starting to dip into the idea of a new morning. “Hey, there’s an idea for an episode, making ourselves into forest animals.”

“What would I be?”

Rhett glanced at Link, considering him for a moment. “I feel like you’d be an otter or something. I can see you meticulously building yourself a little home and laying around in the water all day.”

“Do otters build homes? I think you’re thinking of a beaver. You should make me a beaver.”

“No, beavers aren’t—” Rhett caught himself before the words slipped out of his mouth _. ‘Beavers aren’t your kind of cute.’_ “Otters just fit you better. They have your cheeks.”

“Hey man, what’d I do to you. Leave my cheeks out of this.” Link grinned, leaning back in his seat. Rhett grinned back, noting quietly the way that Link’s toothy smile warmed the pit of his stomach. Just another thing to overanalyze when he was alone.

Jessie had not been as on-board with the idea of him ditching the family during Spring Break as he had assumed, which was strange because they tended to be on the same page for most things.

_“I thought you guys did this stuff while you were on hiatus?”_

_“Yeah, but Link thought—we were thinking it would be a good idea to recalibrate some ideas for upcoming projects, get ourselves excited, y’know?”_

_“…Yeah. I guess. So, this was Link’s idea huh?”_

_“Initially, but I’m on board with it. Why?”_

_“Nothing. It just makes sense.”_

Rhett’s fingers tightened on the steering wheel as he pulled unto the highway. He didn’t understand why Jessie had said that like that. ‘It just makes sense’. What just made sense? He hadn’t pushed it, and she hadn’t brought it up again. Was it the fact that Link had suggested it that made sense? Or did the trip idea overall just make sense. Was he overthinking everything?

Mentally shaking himself off, he reached forward and cranked up the radio, bopping along to the unfamiliar pop music. Beside him, Link was already half-asleep, as usual, his mouth relaxed, and lips parted. Rhett considered Link’s mouth for a second, and briefly wondered what he tasted like. It was kind of interesting that in 30 years of friendship he and Link had never kissed.

If they _had_ ever kissed, Rhett mused, he’d know exactly how soft Link’s lips were, what they felt like against his, how much pressure he applied. He wouldn’t have to be thinking about it right now, running scenario after scenario through his mind like a broken record. _Really_ , it all boiled down to a natural curiosity for the world around him, nothing more. The fantas—the _scenario_ , he’d been thinking about lately was how exactly it would feel to kiss Link pressed up against a wall. Accounting for height difference, if Link tipped his head back just so, and stood on his tip-toes just a little, Rhett could kiss him without even having to bend down.

Of course, he’d have to hold Link around the waist to keep him balanced—Link was so clumsy he’d probably find a way to fall over while trying to get to Rhett’s mouth. The idea made Rhett smile, but now he was thinking, ‘ _what would it feel like to hold Link around the waist like that?_ ’ What would it be like to pull him forward by his belt loops, what would it be like to pepper kisses against his jaw?

It was frustrating, really, that there was so much he didn’t know.

“What’s got you smilin’ over there?” Link’s groggy voice nearly jolted Rhett out of his skin, and he suddenly realized how fast his heart had been racing as he thought over these casually scientific hypothetical situations based solely in curiosity. “You look flushed brother, you need some spf. Sun protection…fortitude? Sun…you need some sunscreen.”

“I’ll add it to the list.” Rhett spoke quickly, daring not to look at Link again.

“And s’mores, don’t forget.”

“And s’mores.”

“Mmm.”

 

 

“Dang, it’s even more beautiful than I remember.” Link rubbed sleep out of his eyes, gazing at the landscape of pine trees and white alders spread around the pristine lake that sat untouched at the center of his field of vision. The late afternoon sun bounced off the lake’s glassy surface, and a small pier lead to a canoe tied up at the dock. A dense forest ran all along the edge of the lake, and all around them smelled of nothing but thin, crisp air and wild woods.

“I’m glad I got the weekend fishing license, even if we don’t use it.” Rhett gazed across the water, arms crossed. He felt small here, surrounded by massive, powerful trees that had been here long before he’d been born. As he turned to Link to indicate they should grab the food out of the trunk and get it into the fridge, he took a second to note just how well Link fit in alongside the beautiful scenery.

“I call master bedroom!” Link grinned, turning suddenly. His eyes flickered with something as he caught the expression in Rhett’s face, but he said nothing. Rhett wondered what Link had made of it. “They’re the same size.” He responded easily, handing Link his duffle bag.

“Well then I call whichever bedroom _you_ want.” Link slung his bag over his shoulder, grabbed a bag of groceries, and made a bee-line for the cabin. “Man, it’s cold up here.”

“Really? I’m feeling pretty warm.” Rhett noted mildly. As he reached for the rest of the things in the trunk, he paused a beat to watch Link walk the rest of the way to the cabin. The woods were so silent he could hear his own heartbeat pounding in his ears. And it was _fast_.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please share any thoughts you have! They're much appreciated!


	3. Shotgun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fate tempts Rhett in the form of a naked Link and too much to drink in the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your support and kind words so far! It really gets me excited to get chapters out quickly!

 

“Alright, I’m just about done with that.” Link declared, deftly shutting his laptop. “I’m happy with some of these reworks so far.”

“Yeah?” Rhett asked, outstretching his legs while leaning into the plush couch behind him. They were seated at the coffee table in front of the unlit fireplace, having decided to knock out some GMM ideas before nightfall so they could have the rest of the evening to themselves. Outside, the sun had long set, and Rhett’s phone read 9:15. They’d been at it for longer than he had anticipated.

“Yeah. Also, mostly, I want a beer.” Link chucked, pulling a couple out of the fridge and tossing one to Rhett. “Easy there, we should probably finish cooking before we get inebriated. You’re bad enough with knives as it is.” Rhett eyed the beer cautiously before setting it on the coffee table and heading towards the kitchen are behind the living room. “It shouldn’t take long, just a couple of burgers—”

“Oops.” Link’s expression was defiant as he opened the can of beer and proceeded to chug its contents.

“Don’t come crying to me when you lose a finger.” Rhett quipped, vaguely annoyed. He set about assembling the ingredients on the kitchen counter. “You’re on chopping duty.”

“What if I want to be on grilling duty?” Link asked, picking up a head of lettuce and eyeing it disdainfully, before miming a bowling motion with it. 

“Last time you were on grilling duty you nearly burned the kitchen down. Not willing to risk that in a wood cabin.”

Link set the lettuce back on the counter, and Rhett could tell from his expression that he’d struck a nerve. “I’m not _completely_ inept, y’know.” Link frowned, gathering the produce to rinse in the sink, before slowly setting about chopping them up in a way that made Rhett anxious, his fingers prone and at the perfect angle to get themselves chopped off. “I resent the accusation.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Rhett responded. It was almost relieving to have Link annoyed with him, and to be annoyed by him. This felt natural, familiar. He reached for a beer from the fridge, deciding it couldn’t hurt, really. “You think the stars are out yet?”

Link was silent, most likely because he was focused on his task of chopping, and probably partly because he was still annoyed. “We should go look at them after this.” Rhett continued. He’d long gotten used to the ebb and flow of their relationship, Link’s many moods. Nothing scared him. They quibbled and made up 100 times a day over the most ridiculous things. Link’s continued silence was unnerving. He glanced over his shoulder. “Listen man, it’s gunna be a long weekend if you’re going to sulk over this.”

“Me and Christy kinda had a fight over that last night.” Link said sheepishly, after a few more moments of silence. “I left the oven on all night when she asked me to heat up dinner for the kids while she was out.”

Rhett twinged internally. He hadn’t meant to bring up something Link was known to be sensitive about, certainly not right after he had already been berated for it. “Come on.” He said after a while, poking at the beef patties as the grilled over the stovetop. “You really want me to affirm how capable a human you are?”

“Maybe.” Link’s tone hinted enjoyment. “It couldn’t hurt.”

“You can do it, serpent king.” Rhett teased, flipping the patties. He could see Link in his peripheral vision, fiddling with his wedding ring, lips downturned, his task of chopping forgotten. “Link, you don’t need me to tell you how great a guy you are. I think you’re…the greatest guy, obviously.” Rhett winced because he hated how awkward that sounded, hated how tight it made his throat getting the words out. Their friendship had never been based in words of affirmation, they just knew. And right now, telling Link how great he was, was especially hard when all he had been able to think about all week was _how freaking great Link was._

Rhett silently tended to the burgers until they were cooked, before turning off the grill. He was afraid to say anymore in case his words betrayed him. Instead, he grabbed two more beers from the fridge, grabbed Link by the arm, and dragged him outside. “Here.” He said, puncturing a small hole in each beer with his pocket knife, guided by the light shining through the cabin’s windows. “Shotgun.”

“What?” Link asked, caught off-guard as Rhett handed him the can. Struggling to find the hole in the can, he had no choice but to tilt his head back and place his mouth over the bottom of the can, opening the top of the beer and letting the beer flow straight into his mouth. Rhett did the same, and within seconds it had become an intense competition of who could finish first without choking. In the end it was Link, who finished moments before Rhett victoriously. He exhaled, grinning broadly. “Yes! I haven’t done that in forever!”

“You’re still the champion.” Rhett said warmly, driven by Link’s excitement.

“I got a big mouth.” Link demonstrated, sticking his tongue out and stretching his jaw as if he were at a doctor’s appointment. Rhett was glad he couldn’t make it out well in the darkness. “Let’s do another one!” Link exclaimed.

“Let’s eat first.” Rhett smiled, relieved and cautious all at once.

“Okay. And then more shotguns! And s’mores!”

“Definitely s’mores.”

 

Rhett had been hoping Link would forget the idea of more drinking after food and s’mores, but it only got him more excited. And now they were out on the pier, drinking and chatting, and Rhett was trying his best to slow down without being terribly obvious that he was _trying to slow down._ “I miss seein’ the stars man.” Link was mumbling. He’d rolled up his pants legs and had his feet hanging over the pier’s edge. “They’re so _magical_.”

“It’s true.” Rhett kept his gaze to the heavens, trying his best not to look at Link. When he closed his eyes, his head spun a little, and he couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or what. The safest bet felt like just keeping his eyes open and staring straight up. “Mmmmh.” Link stretched, grinning. “Y’know what we should do?” He asked, and before Rhett had a chance to respond, Link was stripping his shirt off.

“Y’know the waters freezing right?” Rhett responded. This was his nightmare. He gripped the can of beer he’d been nursing for the last half hour, willing his heartbeat to slow, thanking god for the darkness that surrounded them. “I’m hot as hell.” Link was already tugging at his pants. “We’re doin’ this man.” Clumsily, he reached down with tipsy fingers and began tugging at Rhett’s t-shirt. “Take this off. We’re goin’ in.”

Rhett swatted Link’s hand away. “Go on and give yourself hypothermia without me.” Everywhere Link’s fingers had been on him radiated head.

Link straightened back up, fingers hesitating at his zipper.  “Com’n, Rhett.” Rhett squeezed his eyes closed, just in case that could possibly be enough to keep himself steeled against Link, in case it was enough to give him the strength to stand and walk inside and not do anything he would regret. He wished, he _really_ wished that hearing Link’s voice like that, soft and low didn’t do the _crazy_ things it did to his insides. He wished hearing Link’s pants unzip and listening to the soft rustles of him getting _totally naked_ didn’t make his head swim. But he found himself following suit, stripping down to nothing like he was hypnotized and slipping into that icy cold lake water to be closer to Link.

“You’re right, it’s cold as crap.” Link didn’t sound like he regretted his decision to skinny dip at all, paddling in small circles around the dock.

“Man, I used to be able to drink like 10 beers and be A-Okay.” Link slurred, alternating between treading the water and swimming small laps. “College Link would be disappointed in dad Link.”

“I think you’re misremembering there, buddy.” Rhett smiled softly, watching, mesmerized as Link swam. He could only just make out Link’s lean frame, lit by moonlight. His striking collarbones, broad shoulders, his shapely arms. Rhett’s eyelids felt heavy with alcohol. It was impossible to look away, protected by the mask of darkness all around them he could track Link’s every movement the way he had been willing himself not to for weeks. Digging through the archives of his mind, Rhett tried to remember the last time he had looked at Link without something stirring in his chest and came up empty-handed.

“You used to get blitzed on a six pack.”

“That explains a lot.” Link laughed, the sort of throaty, carefree laugh Rhett hadn’t heard in a long time. He gripped the edge of the dock for balance as his head spun off without him.  

“How long do you think you could hold your breath here?” Link asked, treading the water. Rhett stared at Link’s mouth, and then at the way his blue eyes glinted in the moonlight. “I dunno, I already feel pretty breathless.” He managed to whisper. His tongue felt so heavy; he simultaneously wanted Link as far away from him as possible, and pressed right up against him, close enough to put his mouth on and taste. He so badly wanted to kiss those downturned lips, revel in the look of surprise on Link’s face. He imagined what it would feel like for Link to smile into said kiss, ( _in this particularly fantasy, he’d been expecting it all along, egging Rhett on until he finally just went for it)_. Rhett willed himself to breathe as Link grinned and looked at him from under those damn lashes. He was so fucking beautiful, and naked and _wet_. It was insane that this was happening—another image he wouldn’t be able to shake.

Rhett dipped his head under the water for a second, listening to his heart beat. _‘Stop it.’_

“That could be a good video idea, you think?” Link asked, swimming closer to Rhett.

“Holding our breath?” Rhett asked, confused. He was still whispering, afraid the balance of the entire Universe would break if he raised his voice.

“Yeah, like…we could compete. I mean, you’d probably win with those big lungs.” Rhett shuddered as he felt Link’s fingers suddenly dig into his ribs under the water. He gripped the edge of the dock for dear life.

“You could win with that big…mouth.” He responded, non-sensical, shaking his head. It would be _so_ easy to reach forward and press his mouth to Link’s. He had to escape. “I’m freezing my balls off man, I’m tapping out.”

“Really?” Link asked, cocking his head. His gaze was piercing and heavy. Rhett felt his eyes travel the expanse of Link’s face and body without his own consent. He hated how close Link was to him. He hated how much he liked it. “Well, what’s there to do in here?” Rhett whispered. He knew what he was asking. Link was quiet, his eyes flickering with something Rhett couldn’t make out. The silence was thick and stretched for miles.

“I guess you’re right.” Link finally replied, a slow smile spreading across his face. “Skinny dipping isn’t as exhilarating without girls around, huh?”

Rhett nodded, not trusting his voice not to completely betray him, and dipped his head back under the water as Link hauled himself onto the dock to avoid watching the expanse of his wet, naked body. He’d made it home free without doing anything stupid.

_Just two more days to go._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts, feelings, opinions? Leave a comment!


	4. First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link hurts himself on a morning jog, and he's got just the thing for it.

“You’re gunna laugh at me, dude. But I need you to check and make sure I’m ok before you do.” Link’s voice sounded both sheepish and pained as he entered the cabin. Early morning sunlight streamed in behind him, forcing Rhett to squint against it.

“What’d you do?” He asked slowly, giving Link a onceover from his position on the couch. Link was geared up in shorts and a thin, form-fitting t-shirt, fresh from his early morning jog (Rhett would’ve humbly declined if Link had asked him to join him—which he hadn’t), still covered in a thin sheen of sweat. His hair was fluffy and dishevelled, and a pre-shave 5oclock shadow had already begun forming.

“You _look_ fine.” Rhett spoke as evenly as he possibly good, as his mind went off racing without him about how goddamn _fine_ Link really looked. Sweaty and dishevelled, just like the fitful tipsy dreams that had plagued him through the night as he slept not 6 feet away from Link, separated by only a thin wall. Last night had been a whole _giant_ mess. He’d gotten so hard trying not to stare at Link as he stood, naked and dripping on the dock, trying to maneuver himself inside without being noticed had been incredibly awkward, and the cold shower afterwards in an attempt at diminishing it had done **nothing.** To his credit, he hadn’t touched it—touching it would have meant admitting things that, right now, in the morning light, he didn’t want to admit, didn’t want to even think about. It wasn’t too late to call this all a fluke, a weird blip in time in which he’d accidentally slipped into a 5 th dimension in which seeing Link naked got him hard and he couldn’t stop thinking about him. Any day now, as quietly as it had happened the first time, he’d slip back into his own dimension and everything would be normal again and it would be _fine._

He wasn’t going to jerk off thinking about Link. Jerking off thinking about Link was a no-turning-back kinda event.  

“I think I twisted my ankle or something.” Link hobbled towards the couch, collapsing beside Rhett. “Hurts like crap.” He shifted sidewise, lifting his leg gingerly and carefully taking his running shoe off. Rhett wordlessly let Link rest his foot against his lap, dropping the book he’d been reading to the coffee table. “Where?” he asked, applying the smallest amount of pressure to various points of Link’s foot until, suddenly, Link’s back arched and he gripped the back of the couch, hissing. “Fu--- _ah_.” He groaned, his head lolling back. “Right…there.”

Rhett’s ears burned, his fingers stilling against Link’s skin. “How bad is it?” he asked. “Refer to the facial pain chart.”

Link grimaced just slightly, and Rhett nodded understandingly. “Right. Moderate.” He said, with the mock-seriousness of a soap opera doctor, forcing a grin out of Link. “Is this the part where I inexplicably go into a coma for six years?” He chortled. Rhett sank into the way Link smiled and his eyes flashed, his own smile brightening. They sat, quietly smiling at their stupid joke for a few seconds, and Rhett’s heart swelled as he remembered that _this was why this man was his best friend._

“Don’t worry, I brought the appropriate safety kits. We’ll get you fixed up.” Rhett said finally, letting go of Link’s foot and standing. “We’re still goin’ fishing.” Link assured, sitting up. “I’m not gunna let my clumsiness ruin this. Plus, I really want a fish fry-up.”

“You want a baby aspirin?” Rhett asked as he head towards his room to retrieve the first-aid kit.

“Nah, if I feel worse later, I’ve got something for it. I came prepared too, y’know.”

“Yeah?” Rhett asked. “Should I forget about the bandages then? Mr. Responsible?”

“...”

“Mhm. Thought so.”

\--

“I don’t think there’s anything better than eating food that was alive less than an hour ago.” Link lifted his shirt and pet his full stomach, pausing to look down and marvel at it. “Especially when I’m the one cooking it?” Rhett teased, ignoring the flash of skin that appeared in his peripheral vision. The day had panned out differently than they had planned after Link’s injury, but they had still managed to edit and add a bunch of GMM episodes while fishing—and had ended up with a good catch to boot.

“Hey man, foot." Link explained nonsensically, pointing in the general direction of his damaged goods. "By the way, I never thanked you for carrying me the rest of the way back on the trail. Is your back ok?” He asked, referring to the small walk he and Rhett had taken after fishing on the nearby trail by the stream. He had been fine for the most part (even insisting they go farther when Rhett had been hesitant and set on getting him back in one piece), but then all at once, his ankle had begun acting up in a bad way and Rhett had taken it upon himself to piggyback Link nearly a quarter-mile back to the cabin.

_‘I could just lean on you, man, you don't have to do this.’_

_‘It’s ok. This is easier. You don’t weigh much.’_

_‘'Psh, clearly you need to reorder your tickets to this *gun* show,  brother.’_

“Yeah, more than.” Rhett assured, brushing off Link's concern. “I’m more worried about your foot. We might have to head back early if it’s this bad tomorrow.”

“Hold that thought.” Link said, sitting up slowly, before standing and making ginger progress down the hall towards his bedroom. In his absence, Rhett busied himself clearing the kitchen counter as he waited. Today had been successful, by his new measure of _trying not to think about Link every waking second_. He had made it all the way to lunch without so much as a stray thought about Link, even as they cackled over stupid jokes for the entire afternoon and Link clapped his hand on Rhett’s shoulder, grinning that 1000-watt smile and flashing those _stupid_ baby blues. And okay--carrying Link back to the cabin had been a cheap move, but he _had_ mainly been genuinely concerned for his friend’s safety and comfort. The feeling of his chest pressed up against Rhett’s back, his arms around his neck, his breath warm and inviting, the tickle of his hair—those had just been bonuses. Delicious bonuses he could take his time thinking about on repeat whenever he had a moment alone. Link had let out the cutest sound Rhett could imagine when he had pretended he was going to drop him. It was annoying, _irritating_ , that a 36 year old man could be so damn cute. Link had unhelpfully pointed out that Rhett's ears were red, before commenting about riding on him too hard. 

After that, Rhett hadn't been able to stop thinking about Link riding him too hard. On him. Just--ufhghg. His mind melted a little, heady with bottled up thoughts that he thought might explode from holding in. He felt heavy, and reminded himself he had made it to the end of another day, which just meant one more before he could safely return to his family and be one step closer to escaping this crappy dimension. 

“Ok, Rhett, don’t freak out.”

“There’s no way you hurt yourself _again_?” Rhett’s eyes shot up to scan Link as he re-entered the living room area. Of course there was _way,_ this was Link, after all. But Link seemed perfectly fine, and in his hand were two little devices Rhett was only vaguely familiar with. “Wait…what? Are those…vapes?”

“Don’t freak out.”

“Why do you have those? When did you start smoking?” Rhett strode over to Link in three steps, grabbing the two small metal devices, inspecting them. "What do you mean 'don't freak out?' I don't freak out, _you_ freak out! He and Link told each other _everything_ , that was kind of their **thing.** The idea of Link having a _secret_ from him made his stomach flip uncomfortably and pulled the corners of his mouth down.

“It’s for my anxiety. I just got it.” Link spoke quickly and evenly, getting all the words out at once, and it dawned on Rhett that he sounded nervous. Had he been nervous to share this with Rhett?

“Your anxiety?” He asked, carefully.

Link nodded. “It’s not _awful,_ but sometimes it’s…anyways…doctor suggested it and I figured I’d at least try. I didn’t _jump_ at the chance at first, but I figured it’d be better than the other kind of drugs”

“I thought cannabis made you _more_ anxious.” Rhett gingerly handed Link back his devices. He’d tried it before, in college, but that had been a long time ago and had probably only happened once or twice—neither time being particularly pleasant. Neither he nor Link were the type to engage in recreational drug use, even after moving to California where a vape or bong resided casually in every other person’s home. It just had never been their thing. Or so he thought.

“Not this strain.” Link sounded almost excited as he rattled off a few facts. “It’s called ‘Grandaddy Purple.’ It’s meant to curb insomnia, pain, depression, and stress. It causes next to no paranoia or anxiety.”

“And did it work for you?” Rhett asked, struggling not to cross his arms like a disapproving parent.

“I haven’t tried it. I wanted my first time to be with you, man.”

Rhett felt his mouth turn up without his permission.

“I know you've tried it before. Besides, trying it at home for the first time felt like the most awkward idea I could think of.” Link continued. “Hey kids, give dad the den for a while, he’s gotta _blaze it_.”

“Is it even called ‘blazing it’ with these future boxes?” Rhett couldn’t stop smiling at the thought that Link had refused to do this without him. His stomach started doing the other kind of flips now. 

“Dad’s gotta press a button.” Link corrected, laughing, relief shining all over his face. Rhett chuckled. It dawned on him that Link’s laugh could probably make him do just about _anything_. It was both interesting and terrifying to think about.

 

“So…you wanna my first?”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not promoting drug use! But there it is. :)


	5. Running with Wolves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett and Link get high with each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs I wrote to:
> 
> Satellite- Canyon City  
> The Night We Met- Lord Huron  
> Running With the Wolves- Aurora
> 
> Listen along! :)

Rhett eyed the innocent-looking device Link held loosely between his fingertips. He was more nervous than he cared to admit, an emotion that was only amplified by Link’s curious, hopeful gaze that held him fast. He was vaguely aware of soft, slow strains of music coming from the record player in the corner, and the soothing warmth coming from the fireplace just a few feet away. Nothing amiss, but then there was Link, all tousled, fluffy hair and firm, full, downturned mouth. He was the danger.

Above everything, Rhett realized, he was tired. This weekend, the whole thing, had been the farthest thing from a vacation for him. Spending every waking moment checking himself, correcting himself, holding Link at arms length—he wanted to stop thinking about it all, if even for a few, blissful hours. He reached for the small device in Link’s left hand, and made a big show of it, waving it above his head in victory. “Euphoria, here I come.” He declared, watching Link’s expression, unmoving, determined. He was steeling himself up.

Somehow, it was on Rhett to make him feel at ease. The thought made him chuckle. It always was. “Ready?” He asked, voice low. Link nodded wordlessly, pressing the small tube to his lips. Without a cue, they inhaled in synchronicity, and Rhett felt warmth spreading through his insides all at once. He didn’t stop until there was nothing left to take in, afraid if he did that he would totally chicken out and end up half-high and despondent.

“It’s kinda funny this is supposed to help with my anxiety but my hearts damn near rattling out of my chest.” Link frowned, adjusting his glasses. “This stuff tastes like berries.”

“Don’t worry.” Rhett responded easily, ignoring the sound of his own heartbeat racing away without him. “If the kids can handle this, then two rugged, outdoorsy men like ourselves definitely can.”

Link’s nervous laugh of appreciation sounded far away, but it didn’t diminish its musical quality. Rhett grinned, and it felt so good to smile, he felt himself grinning wider just to test the waters. How far could his smile stretch?

“You feelin’ it already, huh?” Link’s voice came like a whisper through a tunnel, and Rhett closed his eyes to listen for his voice. Link had the _most_ beautiful voice, and he wondered why he had never shared that. It was a thought that frequented his mind so often he hardly noticed it anymore, but now, suddenly, the urge to share this with Link overwhelmed him. “You have a _great_ voice man.” He breathed out, breaking into a fit of giggles that surprised himself.

“Yeah?” Link sounded amused. “You think so? Maybe I should go into radio.”

Rhett’s eyes widened. “Or you could start a podcast.” He laughed. “With your best friend.”

“Sounds like a good idea. I don’t think I need him though, he’s kind of deadweight most of the time.”

Rhett chortled. “You’d be nothing without him.”

“I can’t tell if this is the vape talking or you’re just this cocky.” Link laughed, and again, Rhett closed his eyes to listen. He _loved_ that laugh, and in this moment, it pricked his ears like pure magic. “Who am I kidding, it’s definitely the second one.”

“I suddenly have the urge to write a buddy comedy.” Rhett spoke seriously. “You wanna do that man? Write a buddy comedy? You wanna be good cop or bad cop?”

“Your eyes are _so_ red.” Link laughed, and again Rhett closed his eyes for a moment to listen. When he opened them again, Link was closer to him on the couch, and he liked it so much that he leaned in to the idea of it. “We could live together.” He blurted suddenly. The silence was dangerous.

“Come again?”

“In our show, our comedy. We could live together, we could be roommates!”

“No wives?”

“No wives man! It’s our comedy! We could live together in bunkbeds like we were kids again! Anything could happen in our buddy comedy!”

“Is this how they come up with all those stoner movies?” Link mused, watching Rhett jump up suddenly and pace around the couch. “No wonder they suck so much.”

“Hey man.” Rhett turned sharply, gripping the back of the couch and leaning over it, his face inches from Link’s. “Our buddy comedy would be _amazing_. Just us on adventures across the world.”

“Just you and me?” Link was unphased, his expression challenging. “Wouldn’t it get boring with just us?” He looked down at Rhett’s power stance and mimicked him in amusement, covering Rhett’s hands with his own.

“No.”

_‘No.’_

“The rule is, only us. If you want it to be interesting, you only get to add more _us_.”

“So…clones?”

“Link, that’s an incredible idea!” Rhett lifted his hands to grasp Link’s cheeks suddenly, before releasing him just as instantly. He realized how close they remained, and carefully danced away, bopping his own off-beat tune to the music. Link followed him with his eyes, Rhett was aware. His eyes bore warmer than the fireplace. He felt naked. Link could see right through him, he bet. So what? So _what_ if he knew? What if he knew everything, whatever that meant.

“Sit down man, you're giving me whiplash.” Link called as Rhett danced just out of his reach.

_‘Don’t call me to you. I don't know what I'll do.’_

“Do you think I should take another hit?” Link asked, inspecting the vape he’d laid on the coffee table. “I don’t feel a thing.”

“Maybe that’s what Daddy Longlegs does.” Rhett shrugged, making his way back over to the couch without sitting.

Link laughed. This one sounded nervous. Rhett frowned. He wanted to kiss Link while he was laughing. He wondered what it tasted like inside his mouth. “Sit down man.” Link grabbed his hand and Rhett jerked back, his own smile nervous. “Woah.” Link mumbled, and Rhett scrambled for an explanation that made sense. “It’s not—”

“Woah.” Link repeated, sinking back into the couch. His pupils were blown up like a cartoon cats, and Rhett would have laughed if he didn’t look so beautiful. “Woah, crap.” Link’s fingers splayed across his own face, holding fast like that for a few moments before sliding themselves down his neck. Rhett thought of a joke, but it got caught in his throat, thick and full. “I feel…good.” Link whispered, or at least it sounded that way. Rhett scooted back on the couch to hear him better. “Yeah?” he asked.

Link nodded slowly, then kept nodding, rhythmically. “Yeah.” He grinned. “Fuck, I feel good.”

Rhett’s ears bloomed red. Hearing Link swear felt sinful in a way that tied his stomach up in knots. He wanted him to say it again. “Feels like I’m on clou---feels like I’m flying.”

“Like you’re high, maybe?” It was Rhett’s turn to be amused, as Link squirmed around on the couch like a puppy.

“Yeah.” Link’s nodding slowed, and he began rolling his neck in slow, deliberate motions. Rhett felt himself reaching for Link without his own permission, wordlessly resting his hand on Link’s shoulder. He began rubbing circles there, because there was no other explanation for putting his hand on Link’s shoulder. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth and his stomach felt miles long. Link moaned, his head lolling back. “Wow.” He gasped, and Rhett’s eyes widened, the blush spreading to his cheeks. Against his better judgement he reached out with his other hand and began massaging small, slow circles into Link’s shoulders. Link shifted until he was sitting just in front of Rhett, his eyes closed and lips just barely parted. “I’ll give you a million dollars to never stop touching me, man.” He whispered. “Feels so good, I don’t think anything’s ever felt this good in my whole life.”

Rhett couldn’t help smiling. “I don’t need a million dollars.” He said thoughtlessly. And then, without thinking, he leaned down, inexplicably, into the nook of Link’s shoulder, and breathed him in, hands pausing in their task on Link’s shoulders. It was something he’d been wanting to do, and right now felt as good a time as any. Link smelt faintly of soap and warmth. It was exhilarating. His heart flipped in his chest as, instantly, he realized what he’ d done, and how little sense it made. He wondered if it was too late to lift his head and carry on massaging Link like he hadn’t just _sniffed_ him, as if his face wasn’t still buried against his shoulder.

But it was _far_ too late, it had been too late long ago. Link had stilled against him the second the unfamiliar touch had begun, so still and silent he might as well have been dead. Rhett wished he was, right then. He slowly lifted his head and removed his hands from Link’s shoulders. What did one say in a situation like this? It was too late for a joke. Anxiety and sadness worked to flood away the joy that burned in his heart at being so close to his best friend, and it was an awful mix of euphoria and desperation that crashed over him on repeat. His head began to spin.

“It’s ok.”

“I’m sorry.” Rhett blurted, relief bursting from him the moment Link finally spoke. “I—I didn’t—”

“It’s ok.” His back still turned, Link reached behind him until he grasped at the material of Rhett’s t-shirt, pulling him back in. Rhett was heady with confusion and guilt, but he didn’t fight it. He was too afraid of breaking this moment, too afraid of himself. He let Link lead. Link pulled him until his chin was against his shoulder again, and Rhett lay there, awkward and unsure. His chest now flush against Link’s back meant Link could certainly feel his heartbeat racing.

Embarrassment washed over him in waves. He was aware, vaguely, that Link’s hand still clutched the material of his shirt, and before he had time to think of what that could mean, there was a movement so small he could’ve easily missed it in his haze if he wasn’t _so familiar_ with every single inch of his best friend.

Link arched his neck.

Hardly at all, so miniscule a movement that _arch_ was definitely not the right word for it. Where Rhett’s face sat tucked between the juncture of Link’s shoulder and neck, flushed and warm with embarrassment, Link had moved just slightly away from him, exposing an inch more of his neck. It could be anything. He could have had a cramp, or just felt like moving, or just been adjusted his head. His expression remained relaxed and downcast, indistinguishable from how it had looked moments before. But Rhett knew, and Link _knew_ that Rhett knew. He had to.

_It was an invitation._

Rhett gazed at the record player in the corner for a few moments, watched it spin as he tried to sort through his thoughts, tried desperately to control his heartbeat. But nothing could have prepared him for this, nothing in the entire universe could have helped him know what to do here, in this moment. He only knew what he wanted to do. It was all he could think. So he did it, tilted his head just slightly (it was amazing how easily an innocent gesture could become something more) and pressed his lips to Link’s neck. A shock of terror flashed through him in the moment that followed, but Link’s pulse reassured him. His heartbeat was going just as quickly as Rhett’s.

He let his lips pause there for a moment against Link's pulse, forcing the memory into his heart, before lifting his head again. It wasn’t too much that they couldn’t find a way to laugh it off in the morning, as they had laughed off every moment before it. Another moment to bury, another thing in their friendship that left Rhett's heart wanting. What was one more? But Link had other ideas. It was his turn to move just slightly, until he found Rhett's mouth with his own, slotting their mouths together as if it was nothing. There was no hesitation, only heady confidence, and Rhett had to reach out and grasp Link’s waist to avoid falling apart. Link made a sound of appreciation, his arms snaking around Rhett's neck, fingers curling into Rhett's hair, breathing him in. It was so much better than Rhett could have ever imagined, aside from the awkward, half turned positions they sat in on the couch, all legs and limbs. If this was **it** , he refused to let there be any 'asides'. He pushed and adjusted Link, never disconnecting their mouths, until Link sat cross-legged facing him, his one leg hanging over the edge of the couch while the other stretched behind Link, hooking around him.

“My ankle.” Link mumbled suddenly, stretching out his leg, and Rhett was ready to apologize for his thoughtlessness, but Link was straddling him, and he forgot _everything_. Everything, as this beautiful man he cared for so much climbed on top of him, lithe and impossibly sexy. Fuck was Link _sexy_ , and for once, he could openly drink him in, those crystal blue eyes, those cheeks Link hated to be teased for but Rhett loved so much. His full mouth, now swollen and pink. It sent a thrill through Rhett to finally know what they tasted like. His long expanse of neck that Rhett leaned into and kissed, reveling in the low sound Link made at the back of his throat, lolling his head back. " _Rhett..._ " Rhett forced himself to stop before he left a mark he couldn't explain. He wanted to mark Link all over. 'Mine'. He was so fucking beautiful.

Link reached for him again, reconnecting their mouths comfortably, and it was already so familiar somehow. They were softer than Rhett had imagined, his lips, his body more pliable, more free. He gripped Link’s waist for fear of doing anything that would be too much, and tilted his head to taste as much of him as he could. He couldn’t tell what was the high anymore, and what was just Link. It felt like it was _all_ Link, had only _ever_ been Link, and his mind spun wild and hazy, especially when Link’s lips parted and Rhett felt his tongue against his. His fucking _tongue_. It was too much. “Link,” he breathed, and felt Link grin against his mouth, before nipping at his lower lip and kissing him once more. He sank into it, taking the chance to slip his fingertips underneath Link’s shirt and against the curve of his back. Link moaned wantonly, fearlessly, pressing himself into Rhett in a way that made him throb _everywhere_. He’d thought, maybe, kissing Link would be awful in practice, and he’d realize it was all in his head, that this had never been something he’d wanted, only something he thought he wanted. No such luck, he wanted it more than he could've imagined. And Link was better. 

He wanted to tell Link, before the spell broke, he wanted to tell him _everything_ he’d been feeling, to let it spill out to rid himself of the misery. But he wasn’t like Link. He wasn’t fearless, and he didn’t know how to ask for what he wanted. That was how their friendship had been since the beginning, he let Link take as he liked, never pushing for more. He asked for little but his company in return.

So, he let it pass, let the kiss come to a natural conclusion, let Link smile a sleepy, sheepish grin at him, even though he was **more** awake now than he had **ever** been. He’d managed for this long. Now wasn’t the time to shake things up.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huehuehue. I got so excited to write this chapter I couldn't wait!


	6. If You were a Gorilla

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "How do you want me?"   
> "I want you more ways than I can count, Link. More than you can imagine."   
> "Better hurry. 
> 
> Rhett experiences the first sting of rejection.

“So, last night…that was…somethin’, huh?” Rhett was careful to avoid eye contact as he pushed Link’s breakfast towards him. Classic, bacon and eggs.

“Yeah.” Link smiled, his puppy dog brows lifted and drawn together just a little. Rhett thought he looked beautiful. A beat of silence, and then, “but it was kinda coming, don’t you think?”

Rhett felt his own brows shoot up in surprise. “Yeah?” He responded carefully, keeping his cards close. He dared not let Link know how deep this went.

“Yeah.” Link chuckled, reaching across the table, pushing his oatmeal aside. Rhett briefly considered that, but Link’s fingers gripping his chin distracted him. He smiled into the feeling, wishing this could be forever. Because he understood, he leaned in to meet Link’s lips, and kissed him. He was delicious, and set Rhett on fire. “We don’t have a lot of time left.” He heard himself whisper, woeful.

“I know, how do you want me?”

“I want you more ways than I can count, Link. More than you can imagine.”

“Better hurry.”

Rhett reached for Link, sliding his fingers under his thin, graphic t-shirt, across his lean chest. He had an idea Link liked to be bit, but was afraid to try it. It was amazing, now he knew what he tasted like, what his body felt like, but there was still so much to learn. He nipped at the base of Link’s neck, where he thought might be the most sensitive. Nothing. Oh, right. Because he had no idea what Link would do, how he might sound, how he might react. His mind, having run out of fuel, awoke, frustrated.

Rhett sat up in his bed. It was still dark outside. Another dream about Link, but less frustrating than they’d ever been. A thrill of excited terror ran through him, and for a moment he let himself sink into deep into every delightful freeze frame of that first, electric kiss. He covered his face with both hands, finding it impossible to stop grinning to himself in the darkness. He could hear the soft sounds of Link sleeping through the wall that separated them, and thought for a moment how he was going to miss hearing that. At least they had one more day together. He wondered what it would bring.

\--

“I think I need to head back early. My ankle’s been feeling worse since last night.” It was the first thing Link said upon seeing Rhett, jolting him from the book he’d been silently reading on the porch. The thin, early morning air had Rhett feeling out of sorts. “Want me to take a look at it?”

“As much as I believe in your soap opera doctor skills, I think I need to put my life in the hands of someone that actually has…what’re those things called? A…doctorate?”

“I **really** don’t understand where you’re coming from with this. I’ve served countless of patients, dramatically revealing that they’re pregnant, dramatically revealing they’ve been in a coma for 20 years, dramatically revealing their long, lost siblings—you name it and I’ve got a dramatic reveal for it.”

“Dramatically revealing that I’ve lost my foot due to lack of proper care?”

“You got it.”

Link smiled, rolling his eyes, and Rhett smiled back, ignoring the sick, sinking feeling in his chest. _‘So last night, huh?’_ He wanted to say—like Link had in his dreams, but of course, he wouldn’t, wouldn’t ever dare. He surveyed the lake for a while, savouring the moments before it was all emails and twitter updates and sleeping far away from Link again. It would be a long time before he got time like this again.

\--

The week after their return had been exceedingly busy, reworking the scripts and segments for dozens of upcoming episodes, which meant long days writing new songs, storyboards, hunting for props, all while trying to maintain the commitments they had already put into place before leaving. They didn’t talk much aside from the quick chats on the way to work and back, but it wasn’t awkward, just, busy, Rhett told himself. Link didn’t seem to be actively avoiding conversation about the cabin, he casually shared the story of how he’d hurt himself, and al the fun moments they’d had, all while skipping over the part where they’d made out for an entire half hour. Rhett wondered if it really had happened, but there it was, just the faintest flicker in Link’s eyes. He knew. But he had no intention of talking about it with Rhett. Fine, then.

There were moments, during filming, that he said things he wished he could take back, things he didn’t catch until it was too late. Or looks, so many looks at Link in the monitor that he didn’t realize until they were editing the video in post. And what could he say? _‘Hey Link, I think I overshot my staring at you with a stupid look on my face quota in this video, can we cut it?’_ He kept his mouth shut and hoped no one else noticed what was becoming painfully obvious to him.

They had made it all the way to the end of the episode, and the wheel simply read ‘Ghost: The Musical’. Rhett immediately knew what to do, sliding over to Link and situating himself behind him to re-enact the famous scene from the movie. He covered Link’s hands with his own and felt his best friend stiffen. No big deal, Link tended to get awkward whenever there was unscripted touching during the episodes. He rocked Link side to side to imitate the motion of pottery spinning around the wheel, and they continued singing nonsensically.

‘I’m gunna touch your hands, but you’re not gunna feel it cause I’m a ghost.’

‘I can feel it even though you’re a ghost.’

‘How does it feel?’

‘Little bit awkward.’

‘Yeah. I love you.’

Rhett swore, he’d said it because it was a line from the movie (even though there were a couple other lines he could’ve chosen from), and Link’s awkward reaction was only because he didn’t know the film. Which, Rhett had to cover for, mumbling quickly about how much more smoothly things would go if Link actually took the time to watch popular media. His ears were on fire, wishing he could take the moment back, but he found himself saying it again, because, well, now his toes were in the water anyways.

‘I love you.’

‘Ditto.’

‘There you go.’ He grinned too widely here, even though he had just told Link to say ditto, hearing it still flooded him with endorphins. And he felt reckless, sometimes this recklessness just took him over after these increasingly intense moments of embarrassment, and he figured why not just keep cantering towards the edge of the precipice?

‘ _Me versus gorilla, me. Me versus Link? Hm.”_

_“You versus gorilla, gorilla.” Link had said incredulously._

_‘I would die for you.’ Rhett heard himself say, looking directly at Link. Why, he had no idea. He just wanted him to know. And Link had only opened his mouth, wordless._

_I would die for you.’ He’d said again, pure word vomit, again. Link adjusted his glasses, doing everything not to make eye contact. ‘If you were a gorilla, I would not die for you.’_

Link had said nothing, and thank god Stevie had kept the flow of the episode going with a joke that broke the tension permeating the room. In the moment it had been ok, now, Rhett wished he could take the entire episode back. Now, forever, there would be a permanent record of Link’s crisp rejection.

Which, of course, he tortured himself by watching over and over, late into the night. The moment discomfort ran across Link’s face, and his own hurt expression at the silence, trying to save face in the last few minutes of the episode. It didn’t have to be a lot, but anything? Link could’ve said anything back. Rhett wanted to reach into the screen and comfort himself. It dawned on him, suddenly, that if his emotions were that clear to him through the screen, someone else might have noticed them. The idea was frightening. He scrolled quickly to the comments.

_‘Dang, if anyone gave me the look Rhett gives Link at 2:50, I’d die happy.’_

250 likes. But it was ambiguous enough. They’d been accused of giving each other ‘looks’ for years (even though, at that moment, Rhett _had_ been thinking about how stunning Link looked when he laughed like that. That was aside from the point).

_‘When Rhett tells Link things like ‘I’d die for you brother’ and Link doesn’t say anything back, it breaks my heart. Rhett loves you so much Link, just let him!’_

438 likes. Rhett gazed at the screen for a while, daring himself to read the replies. He reminded himself that most of these comments came from teenage girls that liked to ‘ship’ people, looking for romance where it wasn’t. They’d been saying things like this long before he’d ever developed...thoughts, for Link, and would long after he stopped. But sometimes they hit close to home. He refreshed the page. 450 likes, and 15 replies, and the video had been up not 24 hours.

_‘They’re total friendship goals!’_

Safe.

_‘Seriously, Rhett looks so hurt that Link ignored when he said that. He looks so awkward as Link tries to change the topic. Seriously, Link? Come on!’_

Not safe. And he agreed. He had been hurt.

_‘Rhett’s just like a big brother, he likes to tease Link to get a rise out of him.’_

Sure.

_‘Sometimes I forget they’re friends because I think of them as brothers.’_

Safe.

_‘Guys, I've been studying micro-expressions for years, and I’ll tell you, a lot of Rhett’s expressions scream there’s something more going on here. Trust me, there’s more going on between these two than they’d like us to believe.’_

Not safe. Not safe. Fuck. Rhett clicked his phone screen and squeezed his eyes shut. No, there wasn’t more going on. Not between them. Just for him. He was going to make it his goal to get over this…thing before it totally consumed his life. Link had no interest in talking about it, and he wasn’t going to chase him down. So that was it then. A one and done. Fine.

He couldn’t have known just how far this rabbit hole went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GMM episode S8E83 and the GMM more to it are referenced here.


	7. Ab Blaster 3000

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just when it felt like it was over.

“I’m just not sure why he’s decided to pick up a hobby that could leave him in a full body cast.” Jessie huffed, reaching behind her for the plates Rhett was meant to be handing her. “Why not pick up painting? Or professional…puzzle assembly.”

“You know how kids are.” Rhett responded automatically, his response delayed. A beat of silence passed, and he reached quickly for the plates, handing them over, all while typing frantically.

_‘Wait till I’m benching 230. You won’t be so quick to make fun of my gym regime.’_

_‘Yeah, I’ll definitely eat my words then. For now, I get to keep mocking your weird squat workout until something impressive actually happens. Best friend rules.’_

 “Can you at least talk to him? Longboarding just feels so dangerous. A mother worries.” Jessie tossed a heavy southern accent on at the last line. It usually got an easy laugh out of Rhett, but he remained silent, leaned up against the kitchen counter, a soft smile spread across his face.

“Work stuff?” Jessie asked after a while, the slightest edge to her tone. She clicked the dishwasher shut, waiting for Rhett to surprise. She was used to moments of playing second fiddle to the phone, but Rhett didn’t usually look so _pleased_ about it. It was vaguely…unsettling.

“Huh? No.” Rhett looked up, clicking his phone screen off. “It’s just Link. He’s having trouble setting up some stupid new workout equipment. I think I might run over and put him out of his misery. That cool?”

“Yeah.” Jessie said, too quickly. “Of course.”

“I’ll talk to Locke later.” Rhett reassured, and Jessie smiled. Ok, so he had been listening. Cool, nothing to worry about—not that she was worried. Nothing to think about then. Anyways.

“Tell Christie hi for me.” Jessie offered easily, adjusting the settings on the dishwasher before starting it up. Rhett’s phone vibrated in his pocket as he pecked his wife on the top of her head, and he checked it.

‘ _A drawback to all these squats is my butt is getting bigger. At this rate my pants’ll be able to stay up by themselves! That’s not my brand.’_

Jessie watched that same slow, unconscious smile spread across Rhett’s face, watched his eyes dance as he looked down at his phone. “Link again?” she asked quietly.

Rhett nodded, grabbing his keys off the counter. “Alright, I’ll be back as soon as I can babe.”

“Take your time.”

 

\--

 

 

“What is this even supposed to be?” Rhett asked, staring at the instruction manual and then back at the half-assembled piece of exercise equipment sitting in the middle of Link’s den.

“It’s an Ab Blaster 3000. TM. Blasts your abs into shape while shaping your chest and obliques for a full body workout experience.” Link rattled off, draping across the box of the Ab Blaster 3000 ™ to peak at the instruction manual Rhett was figuring out. “I probably should’ve looked at the manual some more. But I got impatient.”

Rhett shook his head, skin suddenly prickling with warmth where Link was near him. Link has greeted him at the doorway in a fitted grey t-shirt, joggers that didn’t leave much to be imagined, and fluffy, freshly washed hair, which was Rhett’s favorite look on him. The full package of Link grinning up at him while looking like _that_ gave Rhett that headrush that he was becoming increasingly familiar with. And now they were alone in Link’s den, which was just _peachy._ But it had been weeks since the cabin now, and he’d begun to put it behind him as best as he could. There was nothing else he could do.

“I don’t get this sudden interest in hitting the gym every day anyways. You’ve got a great body man.” Rhett began disassembling some parts that Link had put into the wrong position, laying them out on the carpet between them.

“I got a kid’s body.” Link responded, rubbing his hand across his torso self-consciously. “I always thought I would naturally just ‘fill in’ at some point, but I think it’s safe to say that’s not gunna happen naturally considering I’m almost 40.”

Rhett shrugged. Tons of guys any age would kill to look like Link. He didn’t look like a kid at all. He looked a lean, toned…adult. Very adult.

“Look. I think I might make this guy my trainer, his name’s Gabe.” Link sat up on his knees and lifted his t-shirt. “He said he can make my abs come out here.” He drew imaginary lines down the sides of his waist, and across his stomach.

“Then why do you even need this thing?” Rhett asked, gesturing to the hunk of metal that admittedly, he was beginning to figure out.

“Well, they have a 180-day guarantee if I don’t see amazing results. So I figured why not. But you’re not looking.” Link reached over and gently shoved Rhett’s shoulder. “Look man, I’m trying to show you my _before_. The afters pending.”

“Hey, I’m trying to assemble this thing, for _you_ , I might add. Pick up a screwdriver and help.” Rhett said quickly, wanting to grab Link’s t-shirt and drag it down before he ended up taking it all the way off. He kept his eyes trained on his careful task of sorting screws, as Link decided whether it was worth it to bother him anymore. Ultimately, apparently, he decided on ‘yes’, and reached over suddenly, grabbing Rhett into a headlock. “I’m gunna be so strong I can finally pin you.” He huffed, using all of his body weight to try and wrestle Rhett to the ground. Rhett protested, resisting. “Link—” he rolled his eyes, forcing himself to breathe as Link rubbed all over his body. Eventually, he gave in, letting Link shove him to the ground if only to stop the physical contact. But even then, Link didn’t stop, grinning down at him, pinning both Rhett’s arms on either side of his body. Rhett looked up at him with his best exasperated expression, all while thinking how easy it would be to lean up and kiss that full, smiling mouth.

“Are you done?” He asked, when Link didn’t immediately move away. “Got all the pent-up energy out of you.” Link’s expression was changing, and Rhett felt colour flood to his face as he realized Link was feeling his biceps, his hand slowly creeping up along the muscle there, thumb pressing lightly down. Rhett groaned, primarily because it felt good, mostly because he hoped it would get Link to stop. It only seemed to encourage his friends concentrated prodding across his arms. Rhett wondered what this might look like to an outsider, Link leaned over, practically straddling him and rubbing all over his arms while he tried to fight down the half-chub in his pants. He wished it was like it looked like.

“This show ain’t free.” He got out hoarsely, when he couldn’t take it anymore. Only a few seconds had passed, but time stretched like molasses when Link held him like that. Link relented, moving to get up, when Link noticed a particularly dangerous-looking piece of metal hanging off the edge of the Ab Blaster, poised to fall directly on Link’s freshly mended ankle. Without thinking, he shoved Link to the side, hissing in pain as it fell instead on his leg, dangerously heavy. Link took a second to comprehend what had happened, before rushing to drag the large metal piece off of Rhett’s leg.

“You okay, man?”

“It’s a good thing I’ve got lots of leg to spare.” Rhett winced, reaching down to inspect the damage.

“You didn’t have to take the fall for me.” Link said cautiously, frowning.

“You’re welcome.” Rhett mumbled, rolling his eyes.

“Thank you.” Link’s cheeks were developing a tint of their own now. “I just don’t want you getting hurt over me.” 

“I’ve been getting hurt over you since we were six. Not about to stop now.” Rhett chuckled, his stomach tying up in knots at the sight of Link’s expression. Link reached forward and awkwardly pet his hand on Rhett’s shoulder for a couple of seconds, before resting it there. “Hopefully, I’m worth it.” He said, hesitantly.

“Definitely.” Rhett responded quickly. “You’re always…you’ve always…” He faded, embarrassed. Link’s smile brightened, and Rhett couldn’t tell if it was his imagination or not, but was Link leaning in? He held himself steady to be sure, not moving an inch. Now, both Link’s hands were on his shoulders and he was _definitely_ leaning in. Rhett gripped the carpet beneath him, trying to control his trembling fingers. Link’s thumbs pushed underneath his sleeves, the touch was electric. “I gotta tell you, it’s kind of nice to see you speechless.” Link whispered.

Rhett met Link’s eyes, wishing he understood the psychological whiplash he was putting him through. He willed Link to close the distance between them, he’d already gone this far. ‘Just _finish.’_ His mind screamed, fingers digging into the carpet for dear life. His entire body urged him to lean forward, meet Link in the middle, but he didn’t dare, not if he was, _somehow_ , wrong about it all. The ball was in Link’s court.

Time passed, and Link lost his nerve, or maybe Rhett had misconstrued it all, he was starting to lose sense of what was real and what was fiction. Maybe he couldn’t read Link at all anymore. But he was still blushing, and why _would_ he be if he hadn’t at least been thinking of doing something? Rhett watched as Link pulled away to fiddle with the screws on the carpet.

Rhett stared at Link incredulously. ‘ _Really?_ Really’. He wasn’t even trying to cover what had been a blatant attempt at making a pass. And now he was hard, and worked up, and frustrated, because Link was apparently too chicken to complete his course of action. “It’s getting late.” He said evenly. “Think I should be heading back soon.”

Link said nothing for a second, and Rhett thought, wow, he really was just going to get up and walk out like this entire heated game between them hadn’t happened, like they were back in junior high. But, thankfully, Link finally leaned forward and kissed him, a chaste press of lips to lips, just enough of a give for Rhett to be satisfied.  It wasn’t much, but Rhett was blissful, smiling into the kiss and reaching for Link, pulling him close again, breathing him in. Link tasted better than the first time, and the feeling of his parted lips and firm, insistent kisses was nothing like it had been at the cabin. Rhett thanked every god in existence that he was wearing jeans, which—albeit painfully, did the job of concealing how hard he was getting as Link straddled him, hooking each leg against Rhett’s hips. Rhett felt his mind melt as Link’s tongue explored his mouth. He’d never have expected this level of self-assuredness or _passion,_ it was Link who lead, the weight of his body addictive, the scent of his shampoo exhilarating. The way he held Rhett’s jaw and lead him, Rhett didn’t know what to make of himself, only that he wanted more, and then more after that.

 “We should probably save this for when we’re actually alone.” Rhett said at long last, when thoughts of ripping Link’s clothes off and fucking him right over his unfinished Ab Blaster 3000™ became too persistent to ignore. He hated having to say it, but he was pretty sure he’d have no chance of this ever happening again if one of Link’s kids stumbled across them like this. And he really, really wanted this to happen again.  

“When will that be?” Link asked. His pupils were dilated, his lips swollen from Rhett’s handiwork. It only made Rhett want to kiss him again.

“You tell me, brother.” Rhett smirked. “I’ll come runnin’.” He was so fucking happy right now. He wasn’t crazy. This was a thing. Link wanted it to be a thing as much as he did—or at least, to _some_ extent. This had happened without the aid of anything, just, Link wanted him. He squeezed Link’s arms, and Link smiled, kissing him again. “You’re on.”

Yes. Rhett was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://youtu.be/dvt0P44fxIM?t=7m22s to observe Link being beautiful in the outfit that got Rhett tongue tied, here’s the link.


	8. Good Enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Rhett.

“So apparently, the kids are ‘over’ Vidcon. Lily announced that she’s only interested in playlist live so she can see Tana Mango and the vlog brothers or whatevever you call em’.” Link rolled his eyes as Rhett scrolled through the reddit AMA they had posted a few days ago. “All this to say, guess I’m going stag this year because there’s no convincing Christie to join me without the excuse of the kids.” Link finished. “You finding good stuff?”

“On the plus side, if I ignore every question that has to do with us dating or being in a relationship, we only have like 60 to answer. I suddenly remembered why we don’t do q and a’s that often.” Rhett tilted the screen towards Link, allowing him to see for himself. If we were just typing out the answers I wouldn’t care, but if we’re doing this on the podcast we’re gunna need some serious vetting.”

“Just sort them by upvotes.” Link squinted at the screen, adjusting his glasses. “The good one’sll be at the top.”

“Top voted is, ‘how do you guys deal with being seen as a married couple every day’. Doesn’t exactly stray far from the overall theme here.” Rhett leaned away from Link, furrowing his brow.

“The people wanna know! How _do_ we deal with it? Could be interesting to answer.” Link smirked, amused that, for once, he was the one in a good mood.

“I dunno. Ignore it, mostly? Answering questions like this only feed the flames.”

“So let’s not answer it then.” Link dismissed. “Happy?” 

“Great.”

“Why’re you acting like this is new anyways? This has been happening since high school. Maybe even _junior_ high. People think we’re together, they have questions.” Link shook his head, upvoting the questions he thought would be good options for them to answer. “Now’s not the time to start caring.”

“I didn’t _say_ I cared.” Rhett bit back the urge to elaborate. He’d never cared before because their friendship had always been firmly set with rules and guidelines that were not meant to be crossed, armed with wedding bands as the first and strongest line of defense against prying eyes and stupid questions. And now, things were different, but at the same time, they were exactly the same, and it was driving him insane. Again, it had been another week since the last time he and Link had kissed, and he had made three or four valiant attempts at starting a discussion of what exactly was going on between them, and Link had solidly rejected each of them either by shifting the conversation or cutting him off before he could get it started. And again, it was like it had never happened. There was nothing about their relationship that had changed, and more and more, with a burning desire, Rhett wanted it to change, wanted everything to change.

So no, he wasn’t keen on answering questions about their relationship that he himself didn’t even know the answer to.

“Here’s a good one. What’s one thing you want off your bucket list?” Link read, meeting Rhett’s downturned gaze. Rhett remained silent, fussing with his lower lip.

“I’ll go first.” Link breezed on. “I’ve always thought it would be cool to ride a horse at a gallop.”

“That seems like a pretty easy one to cross off.” Rhett said, mostly to be contrary.

“Great.” Link was unphased. “Nothing like checkin’ something off your bucket list.”

“I mean that could probably be arranged—“”

“Are you—”

“In the next 5 minutes.”

“So, what, if a bucket list is attainable, is it not valuable enough for said bucket list?” Link chuckled.

“It’s like putting _“I wanna eat a triple whopper_ ” on my bucket list.”

“Is that…is that on there?” Link asked, concerned.

“No.” Rhett’s lips were stating to quirk upwards on their own volition.

“You should get that on there, asap. I’ll do everything in my power to make it happen for you.” Link laughed, reaching across the table, and laying a mock-comforting hand across the back of Rhett’s, squeezing gently.

Rhett flipped his hand over, so it was palm up against Link’s, a faint smile dancing across his lips. Even this did so much for him. Link made no move to increase the intimacy between them, but he didn’t move his hand away either.

As good a time as any.

“Link, we **need** to talk about us.”

Link’s grin faded quickly, and Rhett’s heart sank as the mood of the entire room shifted. Suddenly, it was cold. Link retracted his hand back to his end of the table, his fingers fidgeting the way they did when he was anxious. “What’s there to talk about?” he said evenly, slipping his wedding ring off and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger.

“I dunno man, maybe how we’ve been friends for 30 years and—”

“Yeah, a friendship that’s lasted this long because we didn’t overanalyze everything that happened between us.” Link bit, and Rhett’s brows shot up.

“Really? That’s the stance you’re going to take? We…we **made out** , man. Do you remember that? And don’t hit me with that ‘we were high’ bullshit, unless you were high at your house last week too?” Rhett could hear himself raising his voice. He hadn’t meant to, but Link’s blatant dismissal hurt him in a way that made him angry.

“I just don’t see the use in talking about it.” Link said weakly, refusing to meet Rhett’s furious gaze. “We did…the first time was just…we didn’t plan that, obviously. It just h-happened. And after, at my house—I…I just thought I wasn’t sure…like…” he faded, and Rhett tried to ignore the way his hands were shaking. He wanted to stay angry, he wanted to yell some more, it felt so good to finally say what he’d been dying to, but the urge to cover Link’s hands with his own and kiss his shaking, fidgeting fingers was starting to overwhelm him.

Link took a deep, shaky breath in an effort to compose himself, squeezing his eyes shut. “I wanted to know if it would be as good the second time. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and I tried so fricking hard man. I just figured if we talked about it, it would become real, and we wouldn’t ever be able to move past it.”

“Was it?” Rhett asked, flinching at how eager he sounded. “Was it as good the second time? For you?”

Link finally opened his eyes, meeting Rhett’s steel grey gaze. Rhett wondered what he looked like to Link right now, if he could tell just how much of a mess he was inside.

“I mean, yeah. Better, probably.” Link mumbled, scratching at the surface of the wooden table, his eyes darting quickly from Rhett to the table and back again. “This is _so_ weird to talk about.”

“Yeah, everything up until now has been totally copasetic.” Rhett jabbed. He didn’t know whether to smile or go back to yelling. From where he sat, Link wasn’t making any sense.

“It just got me more confused. I dunno what’s happening here, Rhett. I mean, what _happened._ All I know is we’re both married men, and we’re best friends, and those roles aren’t exactly up for negotiation.”

“Right.” Rhett’s head felt heavy as he nodded. All that was missing from this speech was a cliched declaration of ‘ _we’re not even gay!’_ But, it wasn’t too late for Link to throw that in.

“So…it’s not too late for us to…just…wipe all of this. We were both…curious. And we satisfied that curiosity, with a weird…just a weird thing we did.” Link continued. He sounded more self-assured now. Rhett wondered if he really believed the bullshit he was spewing.

“Which we won’t do again.” Rhett said, because he knew it was what Link wanted to hear, to wrap this saga up all neat and tidy. Fine, he’d play along.

“Exactly.” Relief spread across Link’s face. “It’s not like we’re gunna do it again. It was just…a weird…freaky incident. Incidents.”

“Ok. So, we’re agreed.” Rhett _needed_ Link to stop talking. As paranoid as he had been about this whole thing, none of his reoccurring, nightmarish thoughts had come close to what he was currently experiencing. “A weird, freaky incident that we wouldn’t dare let happen again.”

Before Link could answer, he stood, nearly knocking his chair over in his attempt to quickly escape the room. “I’m going to do us both a favour and end this awkward conversation.” Rhett did his best imitation of a casual chuckle. Link looked slightly bewildered, mouth half-open, but he didn’t seem concerned. Which was great. “Did you want to finish th—” Link started, and Rhett shook his head.

“Email me.” He said, grabbing his jacket. ‘Whatever it is, whatever you were going to say, don’t.’

“See you tomorrow, buddy.” Rhett threw over his shoulder as he made a quick escape. He noted proudly that he managed to walk out of the room, up the stairs, through the corridors, out into the hallway, outside of the building, into the parking lot, and all the way to his car before he started crying.

It was good enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard to write because it kept making me sad.  
> Reference made to the latest Ear Biscuits.


	9. Undone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett's life continues to fall apart as Link continues to undo him.

Rhett checked the time on his phone, adjusting his position leaned up against the bathroom counter. Ten minutes, long enough for a general sense of wonder as to where he was, but not so long that he couldn’t wave it off with an off-handed comment about having a stomach ache. This had become a habit, taking the moments he could, a couple minutes in the bathroom, an early morning jog, the scenic route home, to think about Link. He’d decided, firmly, that he was going to give up on the idea that they could ever be more than what they already were. Link had been right.

They had families, wives, and as much as he loved—liked, Link, he had made the commitment to Jessie long before these feelings for Link had arisen. It didn’t matter how he felt now, and he’d been blind to think that, by ignoring it, it would work itself out. He let his thumb swipe across his screen for a few more seconds, aware of the hazy smile he no longer had the ability to control dancing on his face.

It was turning into a small collection, pictures, clips, short videos, of Link. Link, asleep on the plane beside him, his mouth ajar, lashes fanned across his cheeks, glasses askew. Rhett remembered taking that one, remembered how he’d thought nothing of it except that this would be a fun picture to post to Instagram. It was bewildering, how that had been less than a year ago, and now, the same picture captivated his gaze, every fine detail of Link’s face. Another picture, of Link on set, adjusting his glasses between segments, his brows drawn together in that concerned expression Rhett loved so much. He stared at this one for a while. Something about the way Link’s eyes shone, his candid pose, his _fingertips_. Rhett knew he was in over his head when Link’s fingertips had become beautiful to him, when watching the way he fiddled and flicked them, constantly in a small state of anxiety, something he had always done, something that had once been annoying, was now so utterly addicting.

It was bad enough that with each passing day there was something new that captivated him about Link, bad enough that looking into that smile was enough to completely undo him. It would be easy if he were simply _attractive,_ a physical desire that could be tempered down. Rhett prided himself on his self-control. In his 16 years of marriage, of course he had found people attractive, desirable. It was natural, and he and Jessie had always been open about that with the understanding that a physical attraction didn’t need to deter from a committed relationship. Once it was in the open, it more often than not quickly faded.

But this was Link. Link who made him laugh deep, belly-laughs with nothing more than a quirk of his brow, Link who incited the purest feeling of safety, comfort, joy. Rhett put his phone away, flicking the tap on to represent the hands that would be washed in a world in which he had actually been using the bathroom. How did you shake feelings for someone you _already_ had loved so deeply? How did you shake feelings for someone that gave you an indescribable level of satisfaction? That the thought of being without was too much to bear? That—

With a sudden, sick feeling, Rhett realized that _there was no escape_. As much as he had thought, and rethought, and tried, he had only slipped further down this slope. He saw no end, and he was sure, at the end of it, there was a crash so devastating there was _nothing_ he could do to prepare for it.  Fear and anger swept over him as hot tears pooled at an alarming rate. He blinked rapidly, self-hatred consuming him. Why, why had this happened? Why him? ‘Why me?’ He gripped the faucet, willing himself to halt the stream.

‘This is your fault.’

Something was wrong with him, broken inside. Only now could he see that. Rhett pressed both palms to his face, applying pressure until it hurt. ‘Stop it. Stop it.’ Stop these thoughts, stop these feelings, for a man that would never—

He squeezed his eyes shut, doing everything in his power to silence the voices. There had to be a way. This couldn’t be _it_. As he stood there, shaking, considering the options he didn’t have, a buzz from his phone jolted him out of his reprise. Clicking the notification, Rhett watched the short snap of Link, grinning goofily, Jade tucked at his side. ‘ _Just a couple of gals_.’ It read. It was non-sensical, and not particularly funny, but Rhett smiled anyways, swiping impatiently at his tears. ‘What a couple o’ heart breakers.’ He sent back via messaging only, too afraid to check if his face looked as if he had been crying. ‘One on the right’s especially cute.’ He smiled down at his phone, his heartbeat picking up with the anticipation of a response, tears forgotten for the moment. He was sure, when he finally crashed and burned, he wouldn’t even _notice_ , if Link happened to be smiling in his direction.

 

\--

 

"I’ll be taking the kids with me to visit my sister. They really want to go to that outlandish summer camp, the one with the waterslide?"

Rhett blinked a few times, shaking himself from his dazed gaze at the book he hadn’t been reading, looking up. Jessie stood leaned against the doorway, her expression determined.

"Yeah?" he offered neutrally. He couldn’t remember if they had had this conversation before. Jessie seemed ready for a stand-off, and he didn’t know what to make of it. “You think Sheperd can handle the sleepaway?”

"There’s a day camp option. He’d come back home at the end of the day.”

“Isn’t that summer camp like ten weeks long?” Rhett tried to remember the brochure his sons had excitedly presented to him. He remembered now, it had been taken off the table because neither he nor Jessie thought that the kids would be able to manage such a long trip so far from home.

“Yes. So, I’ll be staying in North Carolina for the summer, basically.”

"Uh..." Rhett sat up in his seat, unsure of what exactly to say. “When did you…”

"Rhett. I know you’re in love with Link.”   It was a statement of fact, naked and bold.

Rhett was silent, opting to gaze towards Jessie and let the situation that was so clearly out of his hand unfold. In love with Link.  He hadn’t dared to think that, that he was in love with Link.  But as she said it, it made sense. He wondered why he hadn’t let it cross his mind.  

"You aren’t even going to try to deny it?" she asked. She sounded tired, and Rhett realized his misstep. “Why would you even say something like that?” He responded, standing slowly. It felt like things were moving slowly, and underwater.

“Because you are. You really are, aren’t you?” Jessie said faintly, moving towards the nearest armchair and sitting. Her determined stance melted into vulnerability, and Rhett realized it had been for him. A defense against him, against what he might say.

"I don't…" Rhett fumbled, caught off-guard. He knew the right thing to say was no. But he was tired. He was tired of wondering and avoiding his own thoughts, tired of keeping silent. He pressed the heels of his hands against his face again, willing the answer to come to him. “Baby I-I love _you_.” There, that much was true, he knew that.

“I _saw_ it happening. And I didn’t know what to do about it. I saw it before even you, I think. It was terrifying to watch. And I thought, I thought it might fade on its own. But it’s only gotten worse.” Rhett listened to Jessie speak as if he wasn’t in the room. He listened, searching for clarity.

“I couldn’t…be mad at you. I know you didn’t…you couldn’t…do anything about it.” Jessie continued weakly. Rhett felt a sudden tightens in his chest as it all crashed over him, what he’d been doing to his wife in his blind obsession. He had only noticed his own suffering all these months. He had never meant to hurt her.

“I never meant to hurt you.” He managed to get out past the lump in his throat. He reached for his wife and she accepted him, and they both hugged, tearful and overwhelmed.

“I know. That’s the worst part.”

“Jessie I love you as much as I ever have. I love you so much.”

“I know. And Link too, right? Now?” Jessie pulled away, holding Rhett at arms length. Her eyes shone with tears.

“Yes.” He whispered it, testing out the sound of the words on his tongue. They felt right. "Yes." He repeated, louder now. "I'm in love with Link." God, there it was, out in the open. No takebacks. 

Jessie and Link were his two best friends. Being trapped between them both, unable to confide in either--it had been torture. He’d been overwhelmed with loneliness, choked on his own silence. "Jessie. I love him. I love him so fucking much.” It was a sharp relief, but Jessie's flinch sent rivets of shame all through his stomach. 

“Does he know?”

Rhett laughed ruefully, shaking his head. “No…Jessie…there’s absolutely nothing—”

Jessie lifted her hand and lay it against Rhett’s cheek, brushing unshed tears from his eyes. “Rhett. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry you’re going through this. I know how painful it is.” Jessie said. She really did know. “But I can’t…I’m not strong enough to hear about you and…Link. Not now. Not yet. Well, I don’t know, not—”

“There’s nothing to hear.” Rhett leaned into Jessie’s touch. “This is…completely one-sided. Just…me, messed up, and that’s all. Do you really have to leave? This summer?”

“I’ve got to. We both need the time apart. We can, well, we’ll figure it out. We’ve always figured it out.”

Rhett covered his wife’s mouth with a kiss, because he wasn’t sure what else to do, because he was scared and didn’t want to cry anymore. She leaned into him, and he was so grateful. He hated himself for what he had let happen. He could’ve been happy, with his beautiful wife, and his children, in his family. Now she was leaving him, and he really would be alone. He wondered if he was meant to fight for her. It didn’t feel fair though. He didn’t deserve to fight for her. So he held her, while he could.

“I’m so sorry baby.” He really was.

“I know Rhett.” She whispered. She did. He’d fucked it all up.

“We’ll figure it out. It’ll be ok. You’ll be ok.  Maybe after the summer.”

“Yeah.”


	10. Never Be The Same

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett can't get burned enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs I wrote to:  
> Camila Cabello- Never Be the Same (Highly Recommend listening to the second half to this)  
> J2- Love is a Battlefield (Epic Trailer Version)  
> Todrick Hall- Play

“I’m so ready to crash for the night.” Link fiddled with the content creator wristband he and Rhett had been given as a part of their weekend pass. “I never thought I’d get tired of hearing people scream my name.”

“I think your misremembering that.” Rhett accepted the pair of key passes from the front desk attendant, throwing a glance Link’s way. The day had been long—they had recorded an earbiscuits podcast in front a live audience, performed a few of their original songs, and met with more fans than he could have ever visualized them having, all without a crew. The plan had been to at least have Stevie there with them, but with so many projects going on with GMM, it had been impossible to lose the head of their production team.

“Oh yeah? What’d you hear?” Link asked, leaning against the front desk, his smile sleepy and relaxed.

“Rhett! You’re so tall and handsome! What a man! Oh, and I guess there’s another little dude with you but we’re all only paying attention to you!” Rhett cupped his mouth and did his best imitation of a frenzied teenage fan, sending Link into a fit of giggles. “Must be nice in that head of yours.” Link grinned, quirking his brows. “We good to go?”

“Yup.” Rhett handed Link the key to his room and prepared to head with him down the corridor. Their rooms were on opposite ends of the same floor, he had made sure of that, a small point of comfort. With no crew as a barrier between them, coupled with a night completely alone and away from their families, the distance was his best line of defense.

“Anna! Hey!” Link called, grinning as they rounded the corner to their floor. Rhett smiled, recognizing Anna Akana, a friendly face amongst all of the new youtubers and viners he had never seen before. She was standing in the hallway, seemingly in the middle of an intense discussion with a man that leaned up against the wall beside her. He noted the masked look of distress on her face that shifted quickly into a smile as she recognized them. “Link, Rhett, hi!” She waved.

“Looks like we’re floor buddies.” Link shimmied his shoulders, the epitome of a jovial dad. Rhett shook his head as Anna’s smile brightened, clearly amused by Link’s endearing personality, before fading. “Well, we would be.” She said quietly, as a man Rhett assumed was her boyfriend rubbed a comforting arm against her shoulder. “The hotels apparently completely booked out for the weekend and even though I’m a creator, I got added to the roster late and now they don’t have a room for us. We’ve been calling trying to find a hotel nearby but absolutely everything’s been booked because of Vidcon and all of our friends are already hosting so many people, it’s just been a mess.” She spoke quickly, her tone growing increasingly frantic until she’d all but run out of breath, exhaling shakily. “Sorry, it’s been stressful, I didn’t mean to vent like that.”

Rhett immediately recognized the look that flashed across Link’s face. It was the same look he got when one of his kids faceplanted against the concrete and scratched and bruised themselves, or fearfully came to him after a bad dream.

 _Concerned dad mode_.  

Rhett watched it happen in slow motion, wanting to smack the outstretched key card out of Link’s hand, but at the same time knowing that of course he couldn’t do that, and this sweet, quiet selflessness Link demonstrated for those in needs was one of those things he loved so much about him.

“Take mine.” Link said, smiling warmly. For a second, Rhett got lost in Link’s smile, gazing at it, a small smile ghosting his own lips. He was vaguely aware of Anna’s shocked gasp (“Really?? Link are you sure? You guys are too kind…”) and Link skillfully refuting each compliment with well-practiced self-deprecation. “Rhett and I are used to sleeping together from back in the day anyways. Oh--”  Link laughed, catching himself in his typical foot-in-mouth mis-phrasing. “We’re used to sleeping in the same room. Anyways, it’s no problem.”

“Link, I really can’t thank you enough.” Anna shook her head. “Hey, some friends are hosting a little get together down the hall with a couple other youtubers. You guys should totally come by. And, don’t worry, it’s a bunch of OG people you’d actually enjoy spending time with.”

Rhett exchanged quick, silent glances with Link, their primary form of public communication. “I don’t think so Anna. You wouldn’t want two old dudes like us messing up your party vibes.” Link said easily.

“Are you kidding me? You guys are the life of _any_ party! Plus, you’re never able to come out to things, everyone would be so excited to have you around.” Anna insisted, clasping her hands together. “There’ll be lots of free food?”

Rhett’s ears perked. He liked food.

Anna’s smile brightened, noticing the kink in the pair’s armour. “Com’n, when do you get a chance to relax for even a second? I know how hard you guys work, and then, unlike the rest of us, you go home to your families at the end of the day and be dads on _top_ of everything.”

“I know, and we make it look so easy, too.” Link chuckled, checking in with Rhett with another glance.

“I mean, I guess it’s just down the hall.” Rhett offered, shrugging.

“That’s true.” Link mirrored the shrug. “I guess half-hour couldn’t hurt. I gotta be in bed by 9:30.”

“Half-hour it is.” Anna smiled.

Rhett nodded automatically as internal panic overtook him.

 

* * *

 

Rhett hated small spaces. He was six foot seven inches, and needed a lot of room for his limbs. Regular ceilings were already too low for him, hotel ceilings tended to be especially low. The music was far too loud, and what had started out as half-a-dozen friendly faces casually sitting around with beers had somehow evolved into a _rager_ , filled with so many of those twenty-something viner kids his own children liked to watch.

Being a giant, sober man in a sea of _vloggers_ and what-have-yous was bad enough. To make matters worse, he had lost Link almost immediately after their arrival, adding to the general sense of irritation that was starting to overwhelm him. The song blasting all throughout the suite shifted suddenly, and a murmur of recognition reinvigorated the sea of party-goers.

_‘Something must've gone wrong in my brain_

_Got your chemicals all in my veins_

_Feeling all the highs, feeling all the pain_

 “Did you see that one old dude putting those sick moves down on the dance floor?” A giggly, lilted male voice floated from nearby.

Rhett tilted his head towards the source of the conversation as bodies pushed up against him, trying to squeeze past him in the hallway. The source was a small group of flashily-dressed vloggers he’d definitely seen before, downing colorful drinks a few feet away from him.

_Let go on the wheel, it’s the bullet lane_

_Now I'm seeing red, not thinking straight_

_Blurring all the lines, you intoxicate me_

“The brunette? With the glasses?” Another one spoke. They were all dressed and styled identically, quaffed hair, tight t-shirts, and shiny jewelry.  

“Mhm.”

“Stop acting like you don’t want him. I saw you eyeballing.”

“With _those_ moves?” First speaker flailed his limbs around for a couple seconds. Admittedly, he nailed Link’s signature dance move perfectly.

“Yes.”

 “Mmm…I mean…yeah, if you’re twisting my arm, he’s kind of fuckable. In a nerdy dad kinda way.”

Rhett’s skin prickled. He suddenly felt uncomfortable warm and glanced around for a route that would move him away from the conversation he no longer wanted to be privy to.

_‘Just like nicotine, heroin, morphine_

_Suddenly, I'm a fiend and you're all I need_

_All I need, yeah, you're all I need’_

“Unf… _I’d_ call him daddy. You think he’s dtf?”

 “I think he’s with that other dude. The giant one.”

“I swear I saw a wedding ring though.”

“It’s 2015. Men can get married, _Trevor_.”

“Well, we can all tag team, whatever. Should I go for it?”

“You should _definitely_ go for it.”

Rhett finally managed to squeeze his through the narrow, crowded, hallway, shoving open the door to the corridor.

_It's you, babe_

_And I'm a sucker for the way that you move, babe_

_And I could try to run, but it would be useless_

_You're to blame_

_Just one hit of you, I knew I'll never be the same_

The sultry, mid-tempo echoes of the song faded as he strode quickly to his bedroom and jammed the key card into its slot until it unlocked.  Shutting the door firmly behind him, he leaned against it, forcing the unwanted thoughts that attacked him from the darkest corners of his mind away. If he went to bed now, it would be time to leave when he woke up, and he would’ve made it through another night.

If he lay down, and closed his eyes, and fought the demons he’d been valiantly fighting for half a year now, continued to forget what it felt like to be alive, it would be okay.

_‘Should I go for it?’_

He would’ve liked to see the kid try. Watching Link squarely reject him would have been deeply satisfying. Barking up the wrong tree, he was.

Unless he wasn’t.

Even though he'd always known it was a thing, watching someone express interest in Link right in front of him left Rhett with the sickest feeling of twisted jealousy and confusion in his stomach. It was ridiculous, considering the circumstances, but there it was. 

 ‘Well,’ Rhett noted resolutely. It would mean he’d get the room to himself for the night, exactly what he’d wanted.

 

* * *

 

The knock on the door jolted Rhett from his thoughts. It had been hours since he’d left the party. He checked his phone. 2:30am.

“When’d you leave?” Link asked as Rhett opened the door for him. “I’m glad I could find our room. I nearly went to the wrong floor.”

“You had fun?” Rhett redirected, returning to his position seated by the window, as Link shuffled towards the bathroom.

“ _So_ much fun.” Link grinned. He was tipsy. “I honestly think, man, I honestly think I could make it as a dancer.” Rhett listened to the sounds of the bathroom tap running for a few minutes. When Link re-emerged, he looked slightly less disheveled and smelled of mint.

“You must be tired.” Rhett kept his gaze trained to his book, watching Link make his way towards the bed.

“Not that tired.” Link said, eyeing the bed for a few moments. Rhett’s chest clenched as Link decisively chose to ignore the bed, instead wandering over towards him. “How come you’re not sleeping?”

“Not tired.” Rhett said shortly, making a show of turning the page. “Good book.”

“Yeah?” Link leaned down, peering over Rhett’s shoulder. “What’s it about?”

Rhett’s fingers froze against the page as Link’s breath ghosted across his neck. He felt his eyes flutter close against the assault. “It’s about…humanity.” He managed, watching Link’s hands hesitate at his sides before coming to rest against Rhett’s shoulders.  

“Sounds interesting.” Link’s voice was low. They hadn’t been this close in months, and Rhett ached for more, in a way he couldn’t stand. He replayed, as he had a thousand times, Link’s declaration. _It was the last time, the only time, it hasn’t meant anything._ He knew, as he felt Link’s thumb rubbing small circles into his shoulder, that this would be the same, that they’d wake up, and Link would go ‘ _oops, I was drunk_ ’, and he would be the idiot with his emotions splattered all over the floor.

Shutting his book firmly, he stood, facing Link. “We’re not doing this.” His voice exhibited far more certainty than he felt. “Remember?”

Link blushed. “I wasn’t…” he stuttered, caught in the act.

“I know. And we aren’t going to.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“No.” Rhett placed his book down. “I’m not.”

“Yes, you are.” Link sat heavily on the edge of the bed.

Rhett shook his head. He was so tired of this. He was tired of being toyed with, of being dragged around, of waiting for Link to decide he was deserving of attention, of getting excited for more each time, of the disappointment, of the loneliness, of hiding himself. He was _so. Tired_.

“You know what?” he said suddenly, exhaling. “I **am**. I’m mad at you. You…you’ve been selfish, and manipulative, and you _obviously_ don’t know what you want, but you think it’s ok to…to…to fuck around with me because I—”

‘Because I love you. Because you’re everything to me.’

“I’m not trying to fuck around with you.” Link stood, teetered, then sat back down. “I haven’t been…you said it was over. I got conf-”

“ _You_ said it was over. Actually, you said it had never started. Remember?  Remember?” The irrational need for Link to admit to his wrong-doings overwhelmed Rhett. He wanted to fight him, he wanted to kiss him, he was angry and sad at all once. It was all such a mess.

“Well, I didn’t _want_ it to be over.” Link raised his voice to match Rhett’s, making a fresh attempt at standing again, and this time, succeeding. “I wanted…I’ve still wanted—”

“What??” Rhett yelled, furious now, covering his face with both hands, realizing with horror that there were tears there. “Link, _what_ do you want?” God, he wished he knew.

_You're in my blood, you're in my veins, you're in my head_

Link reached up and pulled at Rhett’s hands until he gave in, lifting them on either side of him in surrender. What was the point of fighting it? He was trapped. He met Link’s unreadable gaze, vision blurry with unshed tears. Even now, despite his blinding anger, Link was so beautiful, the sight of him set Rhett’s heart pounding.

Link reached for him and he didn’t resist, meeting his lips in a heated kiss, melting into him. He knew it would all end up fucked up, but it was useless, he didn’t give a damn. Link’s arms snaked around his neck, and his body responded, pulling him close, as close as he could get. Again, it was different than either of the times before, hungry, and blinding and _desperate_. The intensity made Rhett weak in the knees, the pressure of Link’s mouth against his, how much he’d missed it, how _badly_ he needed it. He pulled away to breathe, but it hitched and caught in his chest as Link scooted back on the bed, dragging him down in a surprising show of strength.

Reconnecting their lips, Link moaned into Rhett’s mouth, pressing his chest to the other mans, forcing Rhett against him again. Rhett opened his mouth and tasted Link, his entire body throbbing with feverish _want._ He couldn’t remember the last time he’d wanted something as badly as this man in this moment. Link’s fingers dug through his hair, his sharp teeth nipping and sucking at Rhett’s lower lip before tilting his chin upwards and capturing his whole mouth again.  

‘Fuck.’

“You.” Link said, after what felt like minutes, and Rhett blinked, disoriented.

“Huh?” he breathed, pressing his mouth hungrily against Link’s pulse, missing the taste of him already.

“I want you. Right now. That’s what I want.” Link whispered, fingers tightening in Rhett’s hair, and Rhett felt the vibrations against his tongue. He couldn’t help it, he bit down against the sensitive skin, listening to Link moan, long and low and wanton. “Fuck.” He whispered against his throat, splaying his fingers against the side of Link’s neck. Link’s fingers trailed against his back, and his chest rising and falling quickly, out of breath and hot all over. Rhett bit down again, just to hear more of the sounds Link was making, just to keep tasting him like this. He wanted to mark him all over.

 _“_ Rhett.” Link gasped, hissing in pleasure. His fingers rested against the back of Rhett's waistband now, testing the waters. 

"Link." Rhett moaned, gripping hold of the last bit of sanity he could muster before he lost it all. "Link I need to know that this won't all go away in the morning."

"I promise, it won't go away." Link whispered quickly, lips searching for Rhett's again.

"Link--"

"I _promise_. It happened. This is...we're happening." Link repeated, leaning into Rhett.

"Okay." Rhett whispered, grinning. It would hurt, the crash, but the high felt _so_ good. He was high on Link.

_Just one hit of you I know I'll never ever ever be the same_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is LENGTHY (for me anyways). I put a lot into it for you guys, so PLEASE leave feedback because I'm super curious and excited to read it! 
> 
> I wanted to say thank you SO much to everyone who's left kudos, and especially especially to everyone that leaves comments, you guys don't know how happy you make me. I never expected to get *any* response, so the fact that this fic is resonating with you and is enjoyable to read means so so much.


	11. Checkout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I need...I need you to tell me that you’re attracted to me, and you want to move to the next level, and you’re willing to accept the consequences.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YO. LOTS AND LOTS OF SMUT UPCOMING. It's time to add new tags. ;)

The sunlight peeking through the hotel room blinds was a welcome sight for Rhett. The combination of the unfamiliar sensation of sharing a bed with Link, coupled with the intense see-saw between excitement and fear of what the new day would bring had resulted in a mostly sleepless night. Rhett slipped quietly out of the bed, heading to the bathroom to distract his wandering mind with a lengthy shower.

 

Fantasies about waking up to Link smiling that cute, disoriented smile, picking up right from where they’d left off had danced in one corner of his mind on continuous loop. The idea of that smile flipped his stomach inside out, and brief flashes of Link’s mouth against his sent shivers down his spine. Luckily, he had the ever-present loom of the cold sweep of rejection to keep him from getting too excited.   

 

Shower complete, the thought that Link would most likely wake up bleary and hungover crossed Rhett’s mind. Snatching his keys from the bedside table, he allowed himself one long, open look at Link’s sleeping form before exiting the room.

 

By the time he returned, arms loaded with coffee, water and a plethora of breakfast food, Link was just emerging from the bathroom, freshly showered, a towel wrapped loosely around his waist. Rhett forced his gaze from lingering, instead setting about laying the food on the coffee table. “Thought you might be hungry after your night of excursions.” He offered safely.

 

“You, my friend, are the definition of genius.” Link nodded approvingly. He hadn’t made real eye-contact yet, but it could have meant anything. Tightening the towel around his waist, Link made a beeline for the food, plucking a muffin from the bag. For a while they stood in silence, Rhett doing his best imitation of a relaxed human being hanging out with his friend, nothing on the line.

 

“Sorry.” Link said suddenly, shaking his head, wincing and immediately stopping. “I didn’t ask what was for grabs.”

 

“Oh, no, I got it for you, eat man.” Rhett strode to the window, flinging the curtains open. The view was nothing spectacular, a pleasant cityscape, and it felt safe to look at as he waited Link out. He wanted to tell Link how much he loved his hair in the morning, pre-styled, but was afraid of what would follow.

 

“What floor are we on again?” Rhett winced. He could do better than that by way of small talk.

 

“You really should try harder to keep me accountable.” Link sounded amused, and Rhett turned curiously, immediately being met with the sensation of Link’s mouth against his. The press of his lips was gentle now, and he tasted faintly of blueberries, a welcome change to the heavily liquored flavour of the night before. Link was different again, his mouth slowly working against Rhett’s, taking his time to fully explore his lips, each of his movements slow and sensual.  Rhett let Link lead, relaxing into him, taking Link into his arms, cradling the back of his head with one hand, his other arm snaking around the small of Link’s back. He was aware of the soft thud of Link’s towel falling to the floor, and reached behind him quickly to yank the curtains shut again, throwing them into darkness.

 

Link pulled back for a moment, his cheeks flushed with a gentle embarrassment. He scanned Rhett’s face for a heated beat, before slotting their mouths together again. The silent decision to leave the towel where it lay spoke volumes. Rhett pressed the pads of his fingertips against Link’s back, forcing their chests against each other, and revelled in the sensation of Link’s fingers splayed against his jaw, thumbing the juncture between his ear and neck. Rhett tilted into the sensation, pulling Link closer still. Link pressed into him, and Rhett understood he was steering them towards the bed, and backed up until the backs of his knees hit the edge.

 

Link relinquished his hold of Rhett, moving his hands instead to the set of buttons on his shirt. Rhett let Link undress him, pressing his mouth to Link’s exposed throat and peppering it with warm kisses as he did it. Link’s fingers stilled with each kiss, his body undeniably receptive. Rhett grinned against Link’s neck. It was adorable that he couldn’t multi-task even in bed. So they went like that for a while, Rhett distracting Link with lengthy, hot neck kisses, while Link tried desperately to focus on the task of getting Rhett’s shirt off, until they both burst into a fit of giggles, Link pulling back and shaking his head at himself. He had barely made it to the second button.

 

“You gunna let me finish taking your clothes off?” He whispered, sitting up on Rhett’s lap, a blush beginning to creep into his cheeks. “You know I can’t--can’t...” He trailed off as Rhett attacked his neck again, his fingers curling into Rhett’s hair, eyes fluttering shut. His head lolled back as his lips parted on their own accord, a soft moan escaping him. “Can’t...multitask.” He finally finished breathlessly, eyes still shut. Rhett grinned, kissing Link on the mouth.

 

“I never noticed that about you.” He teased, watching Link’s eyes flash skywards. Link quickly refocused on his task, managing two more buttons on Rhett’s shirt before his fingers stilled again as Rhett bit gently against the juncture between his neck and shoulder. “Oh, crap.” he groaned, and Rhett made the exhilarating discovery that Link was hard against his thigh. Tired of handing over the reigns, and desperate to see Link naked, he reached down and made quick work of his shirt, shrugging it off as he flipped their positions.

Now, Link lay on his back between his legs, on full display. He grinned shyly, aware of Rhett's eyes on him. 

 

“This is different when you’re sober.” He mumbled, covering his nipples in a goofy attempt at lightening the mood. "All my bits are exposed."

Rhett wasn’t having it. He was tired of thinly veiled compliments and sideways glances. Earnest thoughts sat thick in his throat. 

“You’re so fuckin’ beautiful, Link.” He blurted quietly. “You’re so beautiful I can’t stand to look at you.”

 

“I'd say you can stand it. You're starin' pretty hard.” Link said quietly, breaking eye-contact. He reached forwards, tugged at Rhett’s pants, a non-verbal cue for him to take them off. “Not like this.” Rhett leaned over, holding Link’s jaw firmly and directing his gaze towards him again. Link’s tongue darted out, and he nipped at Rhett’s index finger in an overly-wanton effort at getting the attention off of him. Rhett watched him carefully, smiling. He was accustomed to Link’s antics, their friendship had always been partly centered around him earnestly sharing his emotions, and Link avoiding them.

At the same time, this was the same man that slaved over a multi-layered pizza cake through the entire night for his birthday, which had been particularly touching due to Link’s kitchen aversion. And now, he was doing his best to maintain eye contact with Rhett, even though Rhett knew it made him uncomfortable.

 

His heart swelled with a frightening surge of love, and he took Link in for a few more seconds, burning the image of him like this into his mind while he could. Releasing his gaze, Rhett began blazing a trail down Link’s body, beginning with a series of kisses against his mouth, down his neck, his chest, and finally pausing against his upper thigh. He looked up at Link, waiting until his eyes fluttered open, meeting his gaze. Link’s fingers were digging into the bedsheets, his lower lip pulled between his teeth. By all physical indications, he wanted this, and god, did Rhett want this, but still, he needed the confirmation.

 

This would be a new barrier broken between them, one that would be impossible to talk their way out of as ‘just a kiss’, and Rhett was prepared for that, he’d long been prepared for that. He searched Link’s face for answers. “Link,” he said finally, when Link didn’t bite. “This is...I think I need to hear you say you want this.”

 

“Is that your kink?” Link laughed nervously. Rhett sat up a little, mostly because having this conversation with his mouth inches from Link’s penis didn’t convey the level of seriousness he needed.

 

“I’m serious.” he said. “I need...I need you to tell me that you’re attracted to me, and you want to move to the next level, and you’re willing to accept the consequences.”

 

“Rhett,” Link laughed,  gesturing to his comically hard member. “Do you really have to question if I’m attracted to you?”

 

“And?”

 

“I want to move to the next level. I _really_ want to. Again...” Link gestured. “And...I mean...consequences, we’re already in, we’re here. I’m willing, well, I hope there aren’t--I’m willing to accept the consequences.” he finished quickly.

 

“What are you attracted to about me?” Rhett asked, grinning.

 

“Oh, shut up.” Link blushed furiously, sitting up. “Are we doing this or not?”

 

“Tell me.” Rhett smirked. “By the way, you’re _really_ freaking cute when you’re shy.”

 

“Will telling you make you stop talking?”

 

“Only one way to find out.” Rhett let his hand rest against Link’s thigh, just inches from his member. Link’s eyes shot down to the movement and lingered there. “I’m attracted to...your hands.” he said faintly, adjusting himself towards Rhett’s idle fingers, which now strummed a teasing beat against his thigh. “Are you saying that because you want my hand on your dick?” Rhett laughed. Link leaned forward and kissed him easily, which quickly devolved into a passionate tug-of-war, leaving both of them breathless. Rhett’s hand made it way to Link’s member, resting against it lightly. It took all of his self control not to begin moving.

 

“Sorry, I mean, no. I like how big they are. They make me feel...I dunno...sexy?” Link laughed nervously. “Like, I feel...when you touch me...I feel small. In a good way.”

 

“Huh. I had no idea.” Rhett mused, swiping his thumb across the tip of Link’s member just once, revelling in the sight of his hips jerking upwards, over-eager for more.

 

“And, your smile. I really...I love your smile.” Link moaned, laying back against the bed as Rhett’s fingers finally closed around him, offering a few careful strokes. “And your hair...your beard, your shoulders...I like...Rhett, urgh,  I’m attracted to all of you.” Rhett had heard enough, and, without thinking, held Link by his hips and took him into his mouth. Link gasped, doing everything in his power not to buck his hips, for which Rhett was thankful. “Rhett, holy shit.” Link whispered, his back arching. He turned his head to the side, reaching blindly for a pillow to moan into. Rhett hooked Link’s legs over his shoulder, fueled by the sounds that came from his parted lips. He gripped the base of Link’s member with one hand, licking the underside of his length before taking as much of him as he could into his mouth.

 

“Rhett, oh, _fuck._ ” Link moaned in fascination, his toes curling against Rhett’s back. He reached for Rhett, stroking his hair with trembling fingers. “You’re...really good...” Rhett almost laughed at the sound of Link trailing off, but as Link’s body began to tense, he realized what was happening with little time to spare. Having not thought this part through, Rhett froze as well, trapped. “I’m gunna come.” The sound of Link’s voice made Rhett’s decision for him. He continued his task of pleasuring Link until Link’s fingers tightened against his hair, and his hips bucked. “Rhett s-stop, I’m gunna come.” Link moaned. Rhett nodded, hoping it was enough to signify to Link what he was trying to get across. He wanted him, _all of him,_ no matter how messy it was.

 

Link seemed hesitant, but there was nothing he could do. In seconds Link was tightening, his eyes sealed shut in overwhelming pleasure, a heavy orgasm rocking through his body. It hit the back of Rhett’s throat uncomfortably, nearly choking him, but he pushed through, taking as much as he could before pulling off, stroking Link the rest of the way, watching as waves of satisfaction shocked through his body. It was almost enough to push him over the edge himself, and when Link pulled him in for a kiss, gripping his arms as the final shockwaves of his orgasm overtook his body, and Rhett knew he was tasting himself, he decided he had never before experienced arousal in any way comparable to this moment.

 

Link breathed against him, feverish kisses slowing, as his body writhed, basking in the glow of the aftermath. There was little that could be said. Rhett held Link against him and listened to him sigh, exhausted. For a moment, he pulled back, looking Link full in the face, and Link met his gaze, deep, ocean blue meeting steely grey, fearless, at least for now. At least until checkout.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all of your comments guys, it really keeps me excited to write! Hopefully you enjoyed the break from angst for some much needed smut.


	12. Bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett didn’t care who won or lost, so long as he could carry on holding Link in his arms like this forever.

“You guys sure you’re good? I can stick around to help if you need.” Stevie stood at the entrance of Rhett and Link’s shared office, peering in. It wasn’t often that both of them were willing to stay late to work on projects, especially Link, who tended to get sulky if he wasn’t able to make it home by 6:00pm.

“Absolutely.” Rhett glanced up from his laptop. “Everything taken down in the studio?”

Stevie nodded, adjusting her cap and surveying the pair. When no further conversation was offered, she quirked her brow, nodding. “Well, alright then. Good luck with the script guys, see you tomorrow.”

“Yup.” Link nodded, peering into his screen before typing a series of letters out. For a few moments, the pair listened to Stevie’s footsteps head down the hallway, and the reassuring sound of the door clicking shut.

“Wanna see what I was typing just then?” Link laughed, gesturing to the non-sensical stream of words he’d gotten down. “I dunno why I couldn’t think of any real—” The crash of Rhett’s mouth against his was an effective silencer. Link grabbed the table he leaned again for support as the weight of Rhett’s body surprised him, before slipping an arm around his neck, careful to avoid messing with his hair. “Mmm.” He groaned in appreciation after they’d kissed like that at length. “How long you been holdin’ that one in?”

“What time did we get here this morning?” Rhett grinned, carefully removing Link’s glasses and setting them on the table before leading him to the nearby counter. “It’s not my fault you were flirting with me for the _entire_ day.”

“Flirting with you??” Link cried in protest, eyes widening in over-emphasis. “What the crap are you talking about?”

“First, there were the looks you kept giving me in the monitor.” Rhett ticked off, pressing a chaste kiss to Link’s pouted mouth. “Trust me, I caught every single one.”

“I think I need a lawyer present.” Link leaned into the taste of Rhett, frowning when he pulled away.

“Then, you kept egging me on to lick your fingers during that game and I nearly spilled my water with how distracted I was.” Rhett chuckled, leaning in again. To avoid another round of escape, Link captured Rhett around the nape of his neck with both arms. Rhett easily lifted Link unto the counter, hellbent on finishing his list.

“And _then,_ you kept brushing your arm up against mine when you had more than enough space on your side of the table. And the entire time you’re giving me that look—”

“What look?”

“ _That_ look.” Rhett pointed an accusatory finger at Link. “With your brow all furrowed and your eyes bein’ all massive and blue like that. Like you’re innocent.”

“I _am_ innocent. I swear I wasn’t trying to distract you man.” Link eyed Rhett’s outstretched finger, before taking it between his teeth, deliberately maintaining eye contact. Running his tongue against the length, he exhaled softly, forcing a sound of appreciation from Rhett. “You’re more trouble than you’re worth, Neal.” Rhett replaced his finger with his mouth, nipping at Link’s lower lip the way he’d come to learn he liked.

It was now mid-July, which meant it had been a couple of weeks since their time together at the hotel. A small part of Rhett had hoped that once they began getting intimate, it would all fall apart, that they both would realize that they weren’t meant to fit together like this. But there was no such luck. Instead, with each passing day he only learned more about how easily his body melded with Link’s, how quickly they’d grown to understand each other, and how desperately he wanted him.

Making it through a full day without Link against him in some capacity was growing impossible, and he felt it spilling into other aspects of their lives. The desire to touch Link was so overwhelming that something as innocent as grabbing his waist during a bit while they filmed or touching the back of his hand would send Rhett reeling with his thoughts for hours on end, until the crash of Link’s mouth came again. It was crazy they’d ever made it this far before this had happened.

“Oh yeah?” Link asked, his hands slipping to the front of Rhett’s jeans, fingers making quick work of them. Rhett glanced down, before meeting Link’s gaze. “So, I guess you’re not interested in my services?”

Rhett observed Link, calling on all gods he could think of to help him maintain a solid poker face. He had come to decide that there were few things more stunning than the sight of Link on his knees, but he wasn’t about to admit that and give him the upper hand. He smirked, offering a non-committal shrug. “Well, alright then.” Link recognized his bluff and called it, making a deliberately slow move at getting down from the counter. Rhett held him steady, burying his face against Link’s shoulder to hide his smile.

“Say it.”

“Don’t make me say it…”

“Sorry, it’s a contractual agreement that can’t be breeched.  Unless you want to speak with my lawyer?”

Rhett rolled his eyes, lifting his head. “Fine. But only because we share the same lawyer and I’m afraid to find out who’s side he’d pick.” Inhaling, he covered his face with both hands before mumbling, _“Show me what that mouth can do, serpent king.”_

He could feel hear Link stifling laughter. So what, he’d said it _one_ time in the heat of the moment, and Link had refused to let him live it down. “I’m not sure the humiliation is worth the reward here.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way. Let me try to make it up to you.”

Rhett wanted to carry on his disgruntled act, but the feel of Link’s velvet mouth taking him in wiped his mind clear of all functioning thought. “Jesus, Link.” He groaned, his hands hovering over Link’s head, so badly wanting to slip into his hair and grip, but knowing he couldn’t, knowing they had only a few more stolen minutes before Link had to go home to his wife.

Link didn’t respond, focused solely on the task at hand, his eyes firmly shut as if in worship, his tongue warm and heavy. His eagerness to please was in and of itself deeply arousing, and Rhett felt his own eyes seal closed as Link’s tongue worked the underside of his shaft. Pleasure coiled and spread all through his stomach, and he allowed himself the faintest brush of fingertips against Link’s hair, just enough contact to remind himself of who was working this magic on him. Link moaned in appreciation, leaning into the touch, and Rhett quickly lost his self-control, gripping Link’s hair with both hands, earning a breathy, desperate gasp from Link.

“You like that.” Rhett tried to keep himself checked into reality, but Link’s mouth was quickly driving him into another dimension. Link nodded, and Rhett tugged his hair again, harder this time. Link’s breath hitched, and Rhett made the faint realization that it had to hurt, and Link enjoyed that. “Jesus Link, you’re such a dirty boy.” Rhett couldn’t stop himself, the surprise of this new information catching him off-guard. Link’s eyes flew open, his hands and mouth pausing in their tasks. Running his thumb across the head of Rhett’s shaft, he deliberately met and maintained Rhett’s gaze. “Call me a dirty boy again.” He groaned, somewhere between a plea and an order.

For a minute Rhett was stunned silent, overwhelmed at the sight of Link like this, bright blue eyes clouded with desperate lust, his full mouth red and slick. He ran his hand through Link’s hair again before sliding it against his face and cupping his chin, revelling in the way Link leaned into his every movement. Rubbing his thumb against Link’s lower lip, he shuddered as Link bit wantonly into the flesh of his skin. He wanted to carry on touching him like this forever. “You’re such a dirty fucking boy Link. Just _look_ at you.”

The reward of Link’s mouth was instant, and Rhett marvelled at the fact that this man, who gagged on eating olives, was so incredibly adept at deep-throating him. Link pumped him in tandem with his mouth, and Rhett’s stomach twisted and clenched as the heat overwhelmed him. “Link, oh god, I’m—” he gasped blindly, hands seeking reprive in Link’s hair. He wanted to pull back, knowing Link hated the taste, but Link wasn’t having it, working him until he came, fast and hard and blinding. Rhett kept his hips as still as he could manage as crashes of rapture washed over him. Link had had the right idea, it truly was a spiritual experience.

As he came to, Link was spitting the contents of his mouth into the trash bin, his expression relaxed. Rhett smiled, knowing full well how much Link was hiding his grimace for his sake. “It’s ok to pull off you know. I won’t be offended.”

“I’m training myself to like it.” Link stood, sliding his glasses back on.

“You don’t have to do that either.” Rhett tried to stop himself from grinning like an idiot. Link smiled, pushing himself into his arms in an uncommonly sweet gesture of tenderness, and Rhett didn’t question it, holding him like that, Link’s face pressed into his shoulder, his chin propped gently atop Link’s head. Any way you sliced it, they fit well together.

“I gotta go.” Link said after a while, and Rhett nodded quickly. “I know.”

“This time alone must be nice for you. No need to rush home to Jessie after work.” Link reluctantly pulled away, and Rhett missed him already. Guilt twinged in his gut. He hadn’t gotten around to sharing the reason his wife had left for the summer. There was no reasoning that sounded ok to say aloud. ‘ _She found out I was in love with you, so she left. By the way, I’m in love with you. Did I forget to mention that earlier?’_ It was nice to have more time to focus on his work guilt-free, but time at home was lonely and quiet, a constant reminder of the messed-up situation he was currently living with.

“You better run on home.” Rhett offered. “I’ll finish taking everything down here.”

“Yeah?” Link asked, checking himself in his laptop monitor, fixing the hair Rhett’s fingers had tousled just moments before, already chewing a piece of gum to rid himself of the taste. Rhett nodded, forcing his expression to brighten when Link turned around. “Thanks.” Link smiled, and Rhett smiled back. It didn’t reach his eyes, but then Link kissed him and he was indescribably happy again.

“See you tomorrow?” Link pulled away just enough to speak.

“Bright and early.” Rhett whispered, drinking in Link’s face. He kissed him once more for good measure, and Link’s arms were around his neck again, and it was a blind passionate fight for dominance in which Rhett didn’t care who won or lost, so long as he could carry on holding Link in his arms like this forever. When it all came down to it, he was more than willing to throw the fight in Link’s favour, like he’d always been, no matter what it meant for him, or did to him.

 

 Some things never changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have so much fun reading your comments! Thanks to everyone that takes the time to chat with me!


	13. Back To You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhett plans a surprise picnic :)

“You want some?” Link pushed himself up onto his elbows, reaching for the vape he’d tossed into the corner when Rhett had begun distracting him with kisses. Rhett shook his head, readjusting himself on the couch as much as he could without sitting up. He watched Link hazily, waiting until he was finished before reaching for him and pulling him close again. “You’re all the high I need.” He added, forcing a groan out of Link.

“If you weren’t so good in bed, this would long be over.” Link teased, kissing the side of Rhett’s face. Rhett laughed easily, tightening his hold on Link.  He had never been a cuddler, but in the past month he had grown to enjoy quite a few things he had never imagined himself liking. He'd spent an entire afternoon forcing himself to watch Planet Earth with Link, who swore the show was God's gift to media entertainment. They'd laughed so hard through the entire thing that in the end it had turned out to be an incredible afternoon. 

The sex afterwards hadn't hurt either. 

Link rested his head against Rhett’s arm, glancing towards the floor where a checkerboard blanket, overturned wine glasses, and the remnants of a dinner for two sat abandoned. “Thanks for this, again.” He said, reaching over and picking up one of the rose petals Rhett had made a goofy show of scattering across the room. “You really didn’t have to.”

Rhett flexed his arm in an attempt at delaying the inevitable moment it fell asleep under the weight of Link's head. “It was nothing.” Just 4 hours fumbling around with complicated recipes in the kitchen. 

 

“Yeah, it looks like a whole lotta nothing.” Link rolled his eyes affectionately before continuing. “It was great timing. Today’s been…stressful.”

 

Rhett brushed Link’s hair back with his free hand, allowing him time to work through his thoughts. “I noticed. You weren’t in the _greatest_ mood.” An understatement.

 

“It was nothing. I was just on twitter, which I’m gunna go back to avoiding, dang thing is more trouble than it’s worth. Anyways, I saw this stupid video, ‘ _RandL secret relationship exposed at vidcon_.’”

 

Rhett groaned, rolling his eyes. “You know those always end up being fan-made videos that pick at everything we do, searching for a relationship.” 

 

“I _know_.” Link laughed faintly. “It was so stupid too, but I had this irrational…panic. What if someone had seen us in our room? It just…it got me shaken up.”

 

“Would it really have been that bad?” Rhett spoke, without thinking. Link immediately tensed in his arms, and Rhett knew it was time to stop talking, that this was dangerous water, not meant for treading. But he continued, fascinated by the idea of drowning. “I mean, I know it wouldn’t be ideal—”

“Ideal?” Link laughed, sitting up and away from Rhett. Rhett watched him disappear into himself and sighed, covering his face with his arm. “Link, not right now.” He mumbled, suddenly tired. “That’s not what I meant.”

“I’m trying to grasp how me potentially running my marriage and being disowned by at _least half_ of my very Southern family would just be ‘not ideal.’” Link bit, standing and pacing quickly across the room. “Overpriced parking is _not ideal._ Getting spoiled on a movie before you’ve seen it is _not ideal.”_

“I just meant we’d be able to work through it together. If it happened.” Rhett said, sitting up. “Could you stop over-thinking for one second? I’m not the enemy here.”

“You sure about that?”

“What?” It was Rhett’s turn to stand and storm over to where Link stood on the other side of the room, crushing flower petals as he walked.

“I’m not willing to give up _everything_ I spent my whole life building, for you.” Link said evenly.

“I’m not asking you to. Where is this coming from?” Rhett reached for Link and watched him pull away. His throat felt clogged with words he couldn’t get out.

“Sometimes I feel like you’d be happier if all of this exploded in our faces.” Link met Rhett’s bewildered gaze.

“Actually, I’d be _happier_ if we didn’t have to sneak around like teenagers out past curfew. I don’t want anything blowing up in anyone’s face, yet we’re mindfully galloping down the path to implosion.” Rhett bristled, caught between the urge to deescalate and the urge to give Link a piece of his mind. “Which do you think is going to upset Christie more? You and me, or the fact that this has been going on for weeks and you haven’t even considered the idea of telling her.”

“I think I’m never going to find out.” Link crossed and uncrossed his arms in a thinly veiled attempt at preventing himself from reaching for his ring. “And anyways, how can you be so quick to throw stones when you’re in the exact same situation as I am? I don’t see you running home to write to Jessie, you barely even—”

“Jessie knows.” It was Rhett’s turn to break eye-contact seeking reprieve from Link’s blinding gaze. “She…figured it out on her own.”

“W-what are you talking about?” Link faltered. “How? We didn’t even start this until after she was gone.”

“We didn’t have to, man.” Rhett focused his gaze towards the set of plates that only a short while ago he and Link had been eating from. He thought of how happy he’d been then, and how happy he’d been to slave over preparing the meal himself, even if it meant burnt and nicked fingers. It was ridiculous, this whiplash. Their friendship had always been solid, built on the understanding that they would always have each other’s best interest at heart, always have each other’s back. Now, his mind diverged. He wanted the best for Link, but now, he also wanted to _be_ what was best for Link.

“Jessie saw it before I did.” Rhett attempted a chuckle, choking on it. “That I’m in love with you.” They sounded so innocent out-loud. He shook his head, a real laugh coming forward this time. “I’m so, stupidly in love with you. Like, all-consuming, dizzying kind of love. There’s no way you don’t know that. You _know_ me Link, and if you didn’t recognize that—”  

“We never should’ve started this. I knew this was a mistake.”

Rhett blinked. He’d thought a million ways of how exactly he would end up telling Link how he felt, and a million different reactions, some so harrowing they kept him awake at night, or woke him up in a cold sweat. None of them, not one in a million, came close to what he was feeling now.

 “You didn’t _know_ this was a mistake. You wanted this as much as I did.” Rhett managed. He wished it were true.

“Well, it’s…it’s over.” Link said. “This is…it’s going to destroy us if we let it.”

“Yeah. Get out while you can. God, it must be nice for you.” Rhett spat. His eyes clouded with mist, as the intense desire to be swallowed whole by the earth he stood on was overshadowed by the urge to hurt Link a percentage of the amount Link was hurting him.

There was nothing he could do, Link didn’t care. He’d never cared the way he had. The thought made him feel furious and helpless.

“It feels fantastic.” Link snapped. “What do you want me to say? I’m sorry I don’t want to jump ship with you. We’ve always done everything together, but I never agreed to a suicide pact. You need to figure things out with Jessie before it’s too late.”

“Stop pawning me off. If you don’t want me to be your problem, fine. I won’t be her problem either, which is ironic because you two are the people that matter most to me.” Rhett swiped at his face in frustration. “I was tired of this anyways.”

“If I’d known this was so…serious for you—”

“Fuck you Link.” Rhett spat, reveling in the way Link’s brows shot up in surprise. Good. He wasn't going to listen to Link's attempt at reducing this. “No, seriously, fuck you. You knew. You _know_. But you went with it anyway. And for what? Fun? Boredom?”

“Rhett—”

“I’m done. Bye.” Rhett strode out of the room before Link could say anything. He tensed, listening for the sound of footsteps that didn’t come. A small part of him wanted them, and then it was gone. Sadness gave way to overwhelming relief as he realized, for the first time, he meant it.

 _He was done._ Not done crying, not done hurting, not done loving. But he was done with Link. No looking back.

 

_**You stress me out** , you kill me_

_You drag me down, you fuck me up_

_I’m on the ground, I’m screaming_

_~~I don’t know how to make it stop~~ _

_~~I love it,~~ I hate it ~~~~_

_And **I can’t take it**_

_~~But I keep on comin’ back to you~~ _

_~~I just keep on comin’ back to you~~ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took so many rewrites. I'm still not happy with it, I'll probably keep editing it, but if I didn't upload it, I feared I never would. I had a lot of feelings writing this. :( Gah. Let me know your thoughts!


	14. Forbidden

“We have…three more pre-filmed videos we can put together before we’re totally out. After that, it’ll be obvious. I mean, people are already picking up on it but, more obvious.” Stevie was careful with her wording, and Link appreciated it. He appreciated that she hadn’t asked any questions when Rhett had called her with the news that he wouldn’t be showing up for work for a while. She had switched immediately into emergency mode, digging into the archives and backlog of videos to make sure something was ready to air for Monday, and a couple days afterwards. But pre-filmed videos had never been Rhett and Link’s thing, so there wasn’t much wiggle room.

“And then?” Link asked, because he had no idea. And then what? What about when Rhett never came back?

“And then we have to take a forced hiatus or start bringing in guest hosts. I can sub Mike and Alex in for Friday and then start reaching out to people. You could introduce it as a new series until the season is over. We can figure things out from there.”

“People would ask so many questions.”

“Not your problem. Not right now.” Stevie shook her head firmly. Noting the look on Link’s face, she paused, reaching across the table to rest a gentle hand against his. It was only then that Link realized how much his own hand had been shaking. He blushed in embarrassment.

Stevie hadn’t suggested a third option, the one that involved him carrying on his own. Rhett had done it before while he’d taken time to be home with Christie after Lando had been born, but this was different. Obviously. And he couldn’t do it alone. He’d never been able to do it alone. Lando, who, by no accident, shared a middle name with Rhett.

_“You know you’re the only one that can fix this, right?”_

“What?” Link’s head shot up to meet Stevie’s kind gaze.

“I said, let’s keep trying to figure this out.” Stevie said gently, squeezing his hand quickly before letting go.

“Oh.” Link blinked. “Yes, let’s.”

\--

“I swear to God, Christie. I chose you. I _choose_ you. You’re my wife, and I’ll never go back on the promises I made to you and the kids.”

Link wished, more than anything, that his wife would say something. Yell, hit him, anything but stand there, pain in her eyes, refusing to meet his gaze. Christie tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, and Link noted just how much space was between them. She stood in the doorway, looking as if she were ready to flee at any moment, and he didn’t blame her.

“You don’t have a choice about who you fall in love with, Link. You know that more than anyone.” Christie looked up at long last, and it was Link’s turn to shy away from her gaze. He felt himself prickle with understanding, but it was too overwhelming to comprehend. “But, I love you. And I choose you, and I told him that. It’s over, I swear.”

Christie laughed emptily. “You know, you’ve been so happy these past few weeks, and the thought, ‘maybe he’s having an affair? Maybe he’s found a younger woman?’ crossed my mind, but I knew in my heart of hearts that’s not something you’d be able to do, not really.”

Link covered his face. “It wasn’t an affair, it was a mistake. We never—”

Christie lifted her hand, effectively silencing Link. “I knew it wasn’t something you’d ever be able to do, not because of me, your wife, but because of Rhett. Because you love him far too much to even fathom the idea of being with someone else. When I realized that, it was comforting and sad all at once. I lost to him long ago. When you first told me about him—”

“I don’t want to talk about that. I told you back then that it would never work. I love you Christie, you’re who I’m choosing to spend my life with.”

“I don’t want you to _choose_ to spend your life with me. I want you to NEED to spend your life with me, Link. But that just isn’t how it is. If I could change things, I would. I know you would too.”

Link was stunned silent. Christie had always been perfectly astute. It was a trait he admired in those he loved. Astute and headstrong and always right.

\-- 

Rhett wasn’t picking up his phone. After much deliberation and self-suffering, Link finally made the decision to drive over to his home. The driveway was empty, and the mailbox was full. Rhett was very serious about collecting his mail as soon as it came which meant, he was gone. More phone calls. Nothing. More talks with Christie, some tearful, some angry. He confessed everything, and she had known all along. It wasn’t the first time he’d confessed things like this to her. She knew from the start, all those years ago that—

“Jessie, please, let me talk to him. I know he’s with you.”

“I swear to you Link, he isn’t. He called me, told me what happened, and I said he should come join me. He was miserable—what happened between you two? Never mind, I’m not ready to get into…all of this. It’s been—well anyways, he isn’t here. I’d tell you if he were.”

“Okay. Thanks. And—” Link wanted to apologize for all of this, but he didn’t know what to say. ‘ _Sorry for falling in love with your husband, for breaking up your marriage. Sorry for being a homewrecker._ ’ He was sorry for some of it. But not all of it. Some of it he would have never taken back, not in a million lifetimes. Maybe that made him awful, but there it was. “Just, thanks.” He finished.

As he hung up, the realization was satisfying, that he really would’ve done it again, and again. Not because he was awful, but because he needed to, he needed Rhett. And maybe he was awful too, but at least he knew this one thing now. He dialed Rhett’s number once more. His voicemail box wasn’t full, which only meant good things. “Rhett, I know where you are. I’m calling you to give you time to leave, if you really want to. But know this, whenever you go, I’m going to keep looking for you until I find you.” Link hit send on the message.

Knowing what he wanted was an unfamiliar feeling.

But he liked it.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the chapter is short and choppy, so much going on! I'm also sorry for the late upload, work and school started simultaneously and its BEEN A TIME.


	15. Chapter 15

“You don’t seem surprised to see me.”

“You said you were coming.” Rhett’s hand held firmly to the doorknob, his only line of defense against Link. The door was half open, Link standing at its entrance looking exhausted and dishevelled and infuriatingly handsome all at once. Rhett was impressed he had managed the four-hour drive on his own. He wondered if he had taken a break on the way. He had to be thirsty. He reminded himself that he was furious at this man, and pressed on.

“I guess.” Link was saying, glancing into the cabin, clearly awaiting an invitation. Rhett considered denying him, simply closing the door, closing Link out, ending this all once and for all, but his body moved on its own accord, moving to the side and allowing Link in. Fine, but that would be it.

“Are you thirsty?” He heard himself ask, and Link nodded. “While I’m at it, you might as well get started.”

“On what?” Link ran a tired hand through his hair. He hovered at the entryway, right beside the couch that was so similar the one they had first kissed on. Rhett had made sure not to book the same cabin again—he’d actually made sure this one was as far away as possible from the last. Link had found him regardless, as he knew he would. When he wanted something, he was tenacious, but only then.

“Your speech.” Rhett said, filling a mug with water and placing it on the counter. “You have one planned.” It wasn’t a question. Link’s eyes flashed, clearly resisting the urge to roll them. Rhett pushed the mug across the table, a non-verbal shrug. He’d prepared for a lot, for Link giving up and leaving him alone (he knew he wouldn’t be so lucky), for the endless phone calls and messages, Link’s voice pleading and desperate and sweet, for him showing up. He had had time to think about it, think about Link, of all the things he could say and all of the reasons it couldn’t work. He had carefully constructed this wall of reasoning, he was decked out in armour behind it, and nothing Link could say would break it down.

“What if I don’t?” Link asked, picking up the mug, not waiting for a response before he continued. “The show hasn’t been the same without you. Well in the sense that it hasn’t _been_ without you.”

“Is that why you’re here?” Rhett bristled. “You can’t be serious.”

“No. Rhett, it was a joke. Can we not fight?” Link placed the mug down without putting it to his lips. He looked distressed.

“But we’re in a fight. We’re fighting, Link. I’m mad at you. Just because you showed up at my doorstep, doesn’t make me _not_ mad at you.” Rhett picked the mug up and handed it to Link. He had to be thirsty.

“I don’t _want_ to be in a fight. How could you not tell me you and Jessie separated for that long?”  Link put the mug down again without drinking. Rhett gazed at it. It hurt to hear out loud. _Separated_. _That long._ Anger flared. “Is that really what you came down here for? To wag your finger at me?”  

“Rhett—”

“You have no idea how hard it is to have dealt with these feelings for _months_ , only to have you fuck with my emotions the entire time, have my wife leave me, confess to you, and you throw it all back in my face, when I know you have them too.” Rhett snapped. “If I could turn off loving you, I would Link, I really would. It’s been exhausting.”

“Months, huh?” Link was smiling, and Rhett was exasperated. Yes, months, confusing, depressing, lonely months on end of a level of inner turmoil he could have never prepared himself for.

“Try years. 19 years, give or take.” Link finally picked up his mug and took a long drink, enough time for Rhett to widen, and then narrow his eyes in confusion. “I’m listening.” He finally said. But everything was shifting, memories rapidly flashing to the forefront of his mind. He remembered—

“That’s how long I’ve been in love with you, Rhett. 19 years. I liked you even before you could grow a beard and fix your goofy face, before you figured out what to do with your hair. Honestly, I should be _rewarded_ —”

“You got married before me.” Rhett said flatly, sitting with a hard thump on the kitchen stool, then standing again, head reeling.

“I love Christie, I loved her then, and I _wanted_ to marry her. But…I loved you first, before, and after, and all of the days in between. Most of the days in between anyways.” Link stared into his mug, a small, sad smile flashing and immediately vanishing. “Christie knew—even before we got married. I mean, it was hard to hide, Rhett. I was so in love with you, it was embarrassing.”

“I don’t understand.” It was all Rhett could say.

“Take your time.” Link shrugged.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you never tell me?” 

Link rolled his eyes. “Rhett. Do you even remember what life was like in North Carolina for us as teenagers? Do you remember the string of girlfriends you had—”

“You had girlfriends too!” Rhett yelped. His mind had stopped functioning, reeling with this new idea that reshaped the premise of his entire life. What would it have been like if he knew this when he was in College? He had a vague memory that he hadn’t been able to shake, all these years. Link, drunk, his arm wrapped around Rhett’s shoulders, legs wobbly.

_“If only you knew…I’d telyou butm too ‘fraid…wouldn’t matternyway…”_

It had been drunk ramblings, not usually something Rhett would think about twice, except that when he’d jokingly mentioned it the next morning, Link had clammed up and gone totally quiet. It had been strange, so he’d thought about it for a while, expecting Link to eventually bring it up. He never did.

“You…telling me how _you_ felt, when I’ve been in love with you for so—” Link’s voice broke, his ocean blue eyes glistening with tears. “And I’ve kept it so deeply buried, to protect both of us, I wasn’t about to spill my guts only to have you change your mind and—” Rhett closed the distance between himself and Link in a few fluid steps, cupping his cheeks, and swiping at unshed tears before they could fall. His cheek was scratchy with the beginnings of scruff.

 “I managed to ruin everything in a couple months. I’m such an idiot.” Rhett revelled in the feeling of Link’s hands reaching up to grip his forearms. He missed him, even holding him now he missed him. 

“Yeah, you are.” Link sniffed, tears falling too quickly for Rhett to stop. He gave up trying, wrapping his arms around Link and pulling him against his chest, burying his face against the top of his head. He inhaled deeply, comforted by the scent of Link, trying to stop his mind from spinning with new thoughts. “Link, I’ve always loved you. I was just too thick to understand it. It’s kinda like one of those optical illusions, I can’t ever unsee it.”

Link’s breath hitched, and when he finally lifted his head, it was to meet Rhett’s mouth in a kiss, stomach-twisting and gravity defying. Rhett tightened his hold on Link, quickly losing his understanding of time as they stood like that. He realized that he wanted nothing more than to take Link for all he had to offer. And why not? “Let’s get married.” He offered mildly, a gentle statement that had as much weight behind it as Link would allow.

Link pulled back just enough to chuckle, his lips still brushing Rhett’s. Rhett blushed, frowning. “Really? You’re gunna laugh at me?”

“No, it’s just that…I’ve been in love with you for nearly two decades and done nothing about it, and it only took you what, 30 minutes to propose? That’s so _Rhett_ of you.” Link shook his head.

“I know what I want.” Rhett reached for Link’s hand, realizing with a thrill that it was bare, ringless. He hadn’t seen his hand like this in 14 years, not with intent. He intertwined their fingers, endorphins flooding him. “You don’t have to say anything, I just...wanted to let you know how into you I was. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Ok.” Link grinned. “This is why you shouldn’t underestimate my speeches, man. I changed your tune real quick, huh?”

Rhett nodded, too happy to care that Link had been right.

“I keep telling you, you’re too cocky. I’m clearly the one that’s always right.” Link languished in this fleeting moment of victory, beaming. “I hope you remember that.”

“I’m gunna have you singing a different tune in about six minutes.” Rhett growled, pulling Link close. Okay, so this hadn’t been the plan, but who could blame him? He was a man in love.

“I don’t know if I can last that long.” Link grinned, reaching up and nipping at the sensitive skin of Rhett’s jaw. “Then again, I did last 18 years.”

“You’re never gunna let me forget that, are you?”

“Nope.”

_“Fantastic.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm leaving this story as complete guys. Thank you for all your support along the way and I'm glad I finished it. Check out my latest Rhink fic, which is a lot less rough around the edges. 
> 
> He's coming out: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15069347


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